"You're what?" I exclaimed feeling my heart jump out of my chest.
"You heard me" Gerard sighed resting his chin on his hands
I stared at the ground totally in shock. How was I suppose to respond to that.
"Frank, I know you have a lot to think about. I know you are so confused right now, but I am too" Gerard moved closer to me and wrapped his arm around me.
"Wow.. Wait." I stood up "Why have you put me through hell everyday in school?" I ran my hand through my hair. I was totally freaking out.
Gerard looked down, we both knew the answer and he didn't want to say it out loud.
"Frank it doesn-"
"Yes, it does Gerard. Do you know what you have put me through?" I spat
"I was scared Frank, I didn't understand the feelings I was getting from being around you" Gerard frowned
"Everyone develops crushes! When I first found out I was gay I didn't go over to the guy that I liked and start bullying him!" I wanted to punch Gerard. I wanted to just scream and break down but I couldn't. I had to keep my shit when I was around him.
"Please listen to me. I know my side is always going to sound bad but you have to listen. When I started developing .... feelings towards you I wanted to be around you. But everyone knew you were gay. If I started hanging around with you everyone would have thought I was gay too. I wasn't sure if I was then. The only way I could get close to you Frank was to bully you without it looking suspicious." Gerard stood up holding his hands up in surrender.
"Gerard, all I heard was you. "I was feeling" "I wanted" I this and I that! But what about me Gerard? Hmmm? Did I get any say in that?" I could feel a tear rolling down my cheek. "I got enough hatred off everyone Gerard. My friends were gone and you thought "Hey I'll bully Frank to make me sexual satisfied!!" I screamed.
"What the fuck?" Gerard said.
"Get out Gerard." I grind my teeth.
"But-"
"GET THE FUCK OUT" I screamed loudly that Gerard jumped back in fright.
He grabbed his bag and left. I sat there. Was I suppose to be happy that someone fancied me? Gerard knew I was going through hell in school. I was depressed and suicidal and he just thought that maybe he should add to it to make himself feel better?
I laid in my bed all night. I didn't move and I didn't sleep. I kept thinking in my head what had happened. What way I should have acted.
****
The next day I got ready for school. I was mentally drained. I didn't even bother to fix my smudged eyeliner. I headed out to walk to school when I saw Gerard walk down the street heading to school as well. Right now, I didn't want to see him. I just wanted to walk and think on my own. I waited until he turned the corner and then made my way.
School was usual. The only thing missing from my day was Gerard slamming me into the locker. I thought I would never say this but I wished that he did. Then I would have thought that last night was only a nightmare. Lunch came around, I sat down and started into my sandwich when Gerard started walking towards my table. I looked behind him to see his group of "friends" smirking waiting for him to push me to the ground or something.
"Hey Frank" Gerard smiled weakly at me
I continued to eat my sandwich. Gerard took a note from out of his pocket and left it on my table and walked back to his friends. I looked down at the note and was tempted to open it and read it. I slid the paper into my pocket.
When I got home I rushed into my bedroom and jumped onto my bed. I took out the folded paper.
Frankie,
I know yesterday was a total shock to you and I'm sorry for that. It wasn't fair to you. I'm not proud of the image I have made for myself. I want to break it, I want you to help me. I know right now you probably don't want to read the rest but please let me explain. I want to start being with you Frank, whether that's friends or more. I hate everything right now, I might as well have no friends or family. Please give me a chance to make it up to you. I don't care what people think of me anymore. I know I will be happy when I stop giving a shit. I would like to meet up and talk things out if that's okay. My number is at the end of the page.
Love ,
Gee
Was I still upset? Yeah, I was but as I said at the start I could never be angry at Gerard. He has gone through more shit than I have and he has no one. Things could be worst I suppose. Gerard fancying me isn't a bad thing right?
I stared at his number at the end of the page and contemplated texting him for a while. I made sure I had entered the right number into the phone and saved it.
F- Hey it's Frank
Gerard replied immediately.
G- Hi :)
F- You want to meet up then?
G- Yes please :))
F- Meet me at McDonald's at 4
G- Okay, bye
F- Bye
I sat nervously in McDonald's messing with my Mcflurry. I was so mixed up right now, I just hope Gerard has a clearer head then me. Gerard walked in and looked around until his eyes landed on me. A smiled instantly grew on his face. He walked over and sat down.
"Hey" I smiled.
"Hi" Gerard grinned.
"So what's up?" I asked licking the ice cream off my spoon. I could see that Gerard watched my mouth as I licked the ice cream off my lips.
"Uh... Well I want to say sorry for yesterday and ask for a second chance of friendship?"
I looked down and saw that my mcflurry was just a melted mess.
"How can I trust you?" I looked up
"We will just have to build on that. Frank I won't mess this up, you have to believe me. I have nothing else that makes me happy. You're my only source of happiness and I will not screw that up." Gerard smiled
"Okay, but no romance shit yet. I need to start trusting you as a friend first then we'll see" I smiled
Gerard looked down at my mcflurry, I knew he wanted it.
"Fine, you can have it" I smirked pushing the ice cream onto his side.
"Thanks" Gerard grinned and started to tuck into the ice cream.
----
Okay! This chapter is smaller but I will continue this if people are still interested as I'm getting ideas on how to carry this story :D Please comment your thoughts and tell me if I should continue!! If I do carry on this story I will be writing other one shots as well :) hope you enjoyed!
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