Darling you're perfect

Despair in your eyes

Lovino found himself doing every chore without effort. He felt weak and wobbly. Right he hadn't eaten yet. He went to the kitchen and grabbed some breakfast which consisted of toast with sliced tomatoes on top.

He ate quietly and sorta peacefully. No people was better than being around people for him. It meant no chances of getting physically or mentally hurt unless he chose that. Meaning he had complete control of the situation and that felt good.

He was interrupted in his eating when he noticed a red letter sorta hanging off the counter in the kitchen. His eyebrow rose in curiosity.

"What's that?" He murmured to himself.

He set his delicious toast down and stood up, walking over to it. His curious grabby fingers snatched up the envelope looking at the front. In sorta scribbly bold writing it said his 'fathers' name. Then right below it said Angelin.

Wait that name was familiar... Ah that's right the girl his father spoke to over the phone. He couldn't stand it anymore as he opened it up. It'd already been opened up so he had nothing to worry about.

He took the letter out and read it...

What we have is hard for me to handle. I hate how we must hide from him what we have. I can't tell how you feel about me anymore but I know that I love you no matter what. You've gotten worse over the years. I've been doing my best to take care of Feliciano for you to hide the truth but as he gets older he wants more answers. So I'm sending him off to a new family and wiping his memories clean except some. And dropping all contact with you. I couldn't bring myself to tell you this in person or over the phone so I wrote this letter.
I'm sorry.
This is goodbye.

Lovino dropped the letter back on the counter in confusion. Who was this Angelin? And why did she have Feliciano? It made no sense.. He was hiding something from him. Lovino rubbed his face quickly trying to get the thoughts out of his head as he continued cleaning but they just seemed to keep coming back in his mind.

He remembered his brother leaving so long ago but he'd never known where or why. But to know this unfamiliar lady who his adopted father happened to know and be in contact with conceded him and filled him with confusion and worry. How could his adopted father have anything to do with something that happened with his true family...?

-time skip-

Lovino had gotten so distracted with his thoughts he didn't realize he needed to go to the store as well until just now. He quickly washed his hands and grabbed his bag slinging it over his shoulder like many times before. He sped to the door but his eyes widened when he forgot to put a coat on. He turned around and grabbed it. He covered up his bruised arms with the soft fuzzy red sleeves of his sweatshirt.

He opened the door and ran into a body. He gasped terrified as he'd slipped, but the arms quickly grabbed his sides to balance him.

The body was so warm but foreign. Who was this? He opened his eyes and looked up to see that same Spanish boy who he'd seen moving in across from him.

"Im so sorry I didn't realize you were coming out aha I was hoping to meet my neighbor before I went to school" the boy blurted out with a smile as he looked down at Lovino.

Lovino stared at him in shock, but oh he was so beautiful up close. When he realized he was staring his cheeks immediately heated up and he quickly looked away. He pulled back looking down at his feet. His arms were so gentle and warm, they didn't even hurt when he'd touched him which surprised Lovino.

"U-uh..." He stuttered out quickly stepping away from him almost like a skittish cat would.

"Gah I'm sorry If I scared you! My name is Antonio I just moved in across from you" he said happily instantly noticing his skittishness so he made sure to keep a safe comfortable and friendly distance.

"Are you by chance going to school as well? If so is it the one right near by here because if so I'm going to that exact same one!"  Antonio declared almost like a child would but he definitely was at least Lovinos age which surprised him.

He had to keep himself hidden dammit. Keep his walls strong and not let anyone in. He rolled his eyes slightly stubbornly.

"Yep I go to that one so why the fuck did you want to meet me?" He spat out sourly taking note of his name as well.

Antonio seemed to be taken aback by the feisty attitude of the Italian.

"W-well I.. Saw you earlier on the porch and I thought you looked cool, and that maybe we could be friends.." He said in a soft voice before piping up "Oh oh what's your name?"

Lovino's eyes widened slightly. He wanted to be friends with him of all people...? No no no he couldn't let him in. He'd only hurt him like everyone else.

"Uh hello??" Antonio asked again stopping Lovino's thoughts.

"O-oh um... It's Lovino.." He mumbles in response keeping his eyes down.

"Oh what a nice name! It's good to meet you Lovino! Oh oh Lovi sounds even cuter can I call you that??" Antonios asks looking into Lovino's eyes.

"Fuck no you can't that sounds fucking dumb a-and I'm not going to school today anyways" he muttered looking back at Antonio for a moment.

And what Antonio saw in his eyes surprised him more than anything that he'd seen so far with the Italian.

It was definitely despair.