Twenty Two; Lucky One

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Twenty Two: Lucky One

Dan;

I felt guilty. Although I shouldn't, it's just I can't help it. Louise had told me not to tell anyone and even though I haven't, I still felt guilty. I really should tell Phil why Louise disappeared for a few days and that she has my name on her wrist but I just couldn't- I couldn't break Louise's trust like that. 

Speaking of Phil, he was currently out with Ryan. He had no choice but to go with Ryan as he had just turned up and asked him to go to the fair that was at some park not too far away. Phil being Phil, was too polite to say no and ended up agreeing to go with him. When Phil had informed me about this I was a little upset - not at Phil but at Ryan, whatever he did just seemed to grate on my nerves- but I had asked Phil to text me with updates. 

The last time Phil had messaged me was nearly three quarters of an hour ago and I was getting worried. 

Was he okay?

Had something happened? 

Was I just overreacting? 

My mind was filled with all sorts of question and I dreaded to think the endless possibilities of what could happen on this 'date'. 

However, I didn't need to worry long as my phone vibrated, signalling I had received a text. It was from Phil. 

on my way home now, i'll be round in a bit to see you. I love you x

Smiling, I replied with a simple 'okay' and a reciprocation of my love to him before locking my phone and lying back down on my bed, one arm behind my head and the other wrapped around my stomach. 

Closing my eyes I thought to when me and Phil would be in our cabin; together. We would be able to be together and not worrying about anyone catching us as we were completely alone, separated from the rest of society by wildlife. The cabin was small yet cosy, it had two bedrooms and a bathroom as well as a decent living space and kitchen. 

The cabin was sheltered by countless trees that were tall, their thick trunks and large leaves covered us from any passers by. I could imagine me and Phil living there. We would be so happy there; we would be safe. 

On the other hand, we would be away from friends and family and that was the worst thing about it. My mum was the most important person in my life, apart from Phil, of course, and the thought of leaving her behind on her own upset me. 

It was unfair. Really unfair. But it had to be done, I guess. I don't think I could live in a world where I had to pretend to be with someone I didn't love whilst the person I love is with someone else. 

The dip of my bed as the weight of someone else sat down on it was what pulled me out of my thoughts. Opening my eyes, I smiled as I saw it was Phil that had disturbed my thoughts. 

"Hey."

"Hi," Phil said. "What were you smiling about?" 

"You." Phil blushed. I chuckled as I sat up but my laughter soon ceased as I saw the bruises on Phil's neck. When he saw the sudden change in my mood, Phil's eyes widened. He quickly put his hand over the purple marks but it was too late, I had seen them. 

"What are those?" I tried my best not to get angry as Phil was never one to like conflict or raised voices. 

Phil bit his lip, he stumbled over is words as he tried to think of an explanation. "I, uh..." 

My jaw clenched, it was Ryan. He didn't need to say it but it was so painfully obvious on his face and he was the last person Phil was with. "It was Ryan wasn't it." Phil didn't answer me, he just looked down shamefully. "Wasn't it!" I said again, my voice a little louder so he would hear me loud and clear. 

Shamefully, Phil nodded. "Please don't be mad at me, I am sorry- so, so sorry. I tried to tell him no but he wouldn't listen." 

Phil still wasn't looking at me. I sighed. "Baby, no, I'm the one who should be sorry. I didn't mean to shout- hey, look at me." Phil still refused so I forced his head up by putting my index finger under his chin and lifting it up. He still wasn't looking at me, though. At least not directly. 

"I am mad at Ryan, not you. I am annoyed at the government; the world, not you. I could never be mad at you. I just wish I could be the one to leave pretty marks on your neck, not him, not anyone else, me." 

Phil shook his head, wrapping his arms around my neck, a smile on his lips. He was looking into my eyes now. "I'm so lucky to have you." 

"No," I replied, a soft smile on my face as I looked into Phil's eyes that resembled the stream by the hills. "I think I am the lucky one." 

X

This was just a filler but there was fluff so that makes up for it, right?

So since you saw me last I got Three Bs and Four Cs in my GCSE results and I also have officially became a college student as I enrolled the other day. I am so proud of myself, I spent 11 weeks worrying for nothing. (well I failed my pe exam but colleges don't look at that so idc) 

How are you all? Is everyone okay? When do you guys go back to school? remember to bring earphones bc they will save your life. 

- Talia x 

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