If You Let Me Know... [N.H.]

29. If You Don't Know

[A/N: I can now officially say, this fanfic is going to have thirty-five chapters. Which means... there are only six more chapters to go.

Don't worry, as I think I've proven well enough so far, a lot of things can happen in six chapters (or even just in one!)

Feedback is ALWAYS appreciated ! (don't be to harsh on me, please, remember I'm still a lovely person) All right, enjoy! x]

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Sweet caresses on my arm wake me up the next morning.

"Hey" Liam smiles when I flutter my eyes open; "I ordered breakfast"

I smile and get up, trying to eat as much as my nervous stomach lets me.

"I... I gotta go talk to Niall" I say excusing myself.

Liam nods understandingly and hugs me tight.

"It's gonna be okay, Vic" he assures cupping my face with his hands and kissing my forehead.

I force a smile and walk out of the room, knocking gently to the door on the right.

I have to wait a couple of seconds until the door finally opens and a serious Niall greets me.

"We need to talk" he says, and I nod in agreement.

He lets me in and I take a sit at the end of the bed. Niall sits at one of the sofas, a couple of meters away from me. I get up and walk to the sofa next to him and sigh, staring at my knees, waiting for him to say something.

But he doesn't.

We both remain silent for some minutes, our breaths being the only sound in the room. Them... and a voice coming from the other side of the wall.

"I want you to want me this way... And I need you to need me to stay. If you say that you don't feel a thing, if you don't know..."

I scoff ironically at the choice of shower song Luke has picked.

"What are you thinking about?" I finally ask, lifting my head to see Niall with his eyes lost somewhere in the room.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he answers without looking at me

"Because..."

I can't find the words. And I ask myself the same question: why didn't I tell him?

"Because I didn't know how to handle it myself" I answer truthfully, "I didn't even know if it was true. I didn't want to worry you"

"So you went to Harry?" Niall snaps.

The thickness in his accent shrinks my stomach. Because there's only two reasons for Niall speaking with a thick accent: either he's drunk, or something touches him a lot emotionally. Whether he's really excited... or, like in this case, hurt or really pissed, his accent becomes a lot stronger.

"I didn't know what to do, Niall" I admit, looking down.

"You've been telling me all this year that I don't trust you enough. But you've refused to trust me in one of the most important things in life"

I don't answer.

"What if the test had been positive? Would you have told me then?"

I sigh.