26. therapists and cry babies

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[Cry Baby by The NBHD... all my hoodlums out there, what's your favorite song from Wiped Out! ?]

COULD YOU GUYS PRETTY PLEASE CHECK OUT OPEN? IT USED TO HAVE A LOT OF READS AND IT'S NOT ANYMORE AND I'M PUTTING SO MUCH INTO IT, THAT KIND OF HURTS. x

|26.| therapists and cry babies

"Tell me what happened," I'd demanded that night after watching Oliver held my breath as he shoved his face into his hands, sobbing for around five minutes after I'd shut the door in his face. I could sense the desolation as he carried his body down my steps and walked down the street, back to his home, tears being wiped from his face harshly by his bruised and bandaged hand. I'd had a headache from how much crying I'd done and my lips were chapped from the cold, hands shaking as I fought the urge to open the door and run after Oliver, begging him to talk to me.

"Emerson..." January had trailed off. He was in the middle of making the bed he was going to share with me that night since he hadn't talked to Jackson since he'd overheard our conversation. He'd frozen, body gone rigid and he'd allowed the sheet to slip out of his hands.

"Tell me, Jan." I'd gotten closer, turning him around by his wrist sharply, forgetting the problem he'd hand under his sleeve. January recoiled away from my touch, letting out a sharp hiss as his right hand came up to grip it, I could see the blood on his fingers when he pulled his hand away.

"I'm sorry," I'd said quickly, trying to get a look at it and being shoved away gently, "Jan-"

Cutting me off with a sharp tone, his voice was harsh, " It's fine. I just, I don't feel like talking."

"Do you not trust me?" was all I could come up with, my head spinning as I tried to recall when Jan became closer to Sidney than me and when he started leaving me out. I'd almost started to compare myself to Kat.

He was quick to stop me in my tracks, "Of course I trust you."

"Then why would you tell me? You told Sidney!" I fired back, not really understanding what exactly was happening. I was clouded with pent up emotions and all I could do was yell.

That seemed to be the same case for Jan, "Sidney was there, she saw it happen!"

"Saw what happen?"

He was silent, stopping in his tracks and debating what was going on before he grabbed my wrist and pulled me onto the bed with him. I obviously and without hesitation obliged, pushing my face into Jan's chest as we laid there, my hand entangled in his in the most meaningful yet meaningless way possible. And with a sigh, he began to tell me his story.

"You remember that project that I had last year in Mr. Sample's class? The one where I was partnered up with Oliver?"

I chuckled, recalling back to early may of that year, a few weeks after Jan had publically came out, "Yeah, you wouldn't quit talking about how hot he was and nearly fainted when he agreed to come over your house to work on it."

"Yeah," Jan blushed, the warmth spreading through his chest and I could feel his breath in my hair, "well, anyways, we started to hang out a bit and eventually we started talking outside of school. Everyone knew him, he was big in football that year, taking Phoenix's spot for a short period of time and you know that I had just come out of the closet."

"Wait..." it was sounding oddly like some godforsaken love-triangle and my eyes snapped open as quick as possible, "Do you- Do you like him, Jan?"

He was quick to deny, "No, God no! He's not even my type, you know I have a thing for guys with tans, he's way too fucking pale."

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