Whats Love Got to do With it?: An Arranged Marriage to a Stranger

Arranged Marriage to a Stranger (2)

Arranged Marriage to a Stranger

Ok, here's the second chapter. I'm new at writing, so it's hard for me to tell if what I write is actually entertaining or not. So any feedback, positive or negative is appreciated :)

Chapter 2

School passed by quickly and in a blur, just how I liked it, and after my last class I returned home promptly, like the good little girl that I am, to face another sentence of torture by the donut nazi, a.k.a my mother. Luckily enough for me, she was too distracted cooking to notice my arrival so I quickly retreated into the safe confines of my room. Ahh, freedom at last!

"Hello Carmella"

Well there goes my day, and my lunch.

Uggh, my sister was sitting on my bed. She was sitting on my bed getting her over-powering, over-priced perfume on my stuff, destroying the perfect detergent scent I had craftily applied to my comforter by stuffing fabric softener sheets inside the down.

Not only that, but she was using my favorite pillow as a support for her fat ass, which she likes to blame on the huge fetus currently feeding off of her life force inside her very angry looking engorged stomach. In actuallity, my sister has completely depleted the entire northeast region of its chocolate truffle researve. Cocoa farmers in Bolivia send her thank you cards for their holiday bonus.

"Oh come on Cara I just washed all of my sheets and now your getting all your pre-natal germs on my stuff! Can't you and your fat unborn baby find somewhere else to seep all your crazy woman hormones into."

"God Carmella, stop being such a drama queen, besides this used to be my room, remember, no amount of bleach or scrubbing could get out all whats in this room." Ew. "And me and my baby are not fat!" She shrieked, an evil glint in her eyes. Where have I seen that look before?

"Yeah, well tell that to your ass, because I don't think it got the message." Yes, I know, its slightly imoral to be a bitch to a severly pregnant women, but its not like she's making it easy to be nice to her. But I'll stop, I wouldn't want to send her into labor in my room, blah.

Cara huffed, and I could almost see the steam coming from her ears. My sister is a pretty vain person, even in her current ginormous and flatulent state, and did not take fat jokes lightly. "You know, I came in here with the intentions of being a good big sister and was going to let you in on a huge secret that mom and dad were hiding from you. I was going to let you be prepared for tonight, but you know what, I think I would enjoy it much more to see you squirm and suffer. So I guess I'll see you at dinner, baby sister."

And with that my sister heaved her body back towards my wall then flung her gigantic, swollen self off my bed, landed on her feet, then waddled out of the room. It was the most disturbing and  amusing thing I think I have ever seen. Distraction quickly turned into panic, however, as I finally processed what my sister had said.

I mean, I knew my parents had some news to tell me tonight, thats why I had to stay home, but I wasn't really nervous about it until now. I mean, my mom had said it would be good news, but then again, I'm pretty sure our definitions of "good" aren't the same. And it would have to be something huge for them to keep it a secret from me only. Oh man, secrets are bad, they usually end in me being shipped to crazy aunt Eileen's farm for the summer because I'm too little to enjoy island vacations. 

"Oh, crap. Oh, crap. Oh, crap." I think I'm hyperventilating. Ok, what is it I'm supposed to do to calm down? Right, head in between my legs and slow breaths.

"Uh, Carmella?"

Oh, well this is akward. It's not everyday that your brother walks in on you with your eyes closed and your butt in the air. 

"Hey Eitan"

"Um, mom told me to tell you that dinner's ready and for you to come down" Eitan tolf me meekly, his hand rubbing the back of his neck like he does whenver he's uncomfortable. Yeah, you and me both.

"Ok, thanks. And Eitan?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we never mention this, like, ever again?"

"Already working on burning the image out of my brain."

"Thanks". Well, I guess I should proably stand up now like the normal human being I'm not.

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I walked downstairs to see everyone already sitting at the table, and when I say everyone, I mean everyone. Both my parents, my sister (blah, she was giving me an evil grin), her dorky husband, my oldest brother Illias, then my next brother Eitan, and my last brother Reuven. It had been a long time since all of us were together for dinner, and though usually I would see tonight as a nice change of pace, I had a sickening feeling in my gut that tonight was gonna suck. Everyone was staring at me. Let the suckfest begin.

And yes, yes it did. It began, it endured for two hours and it culminated in a giant, sucky explosion.

My sister's penetrating gaze never left my face the entire night, an evil glint, which I fully believe is hereditary, sparkling in her eyes. My father looked like he was about to pass out at any second, while my mother looked just the opposite, her lips stretched wide in an over excited grin that I thought she could no longer make after the amounts of botox she had pumped into her face on a regular basis. To top it all off, not one of my brothers, who have always been my best friends and protectors, would come to my rescue.

Every time I would look at them they would just avert their eyes or conviently choke on a piece of asparagus forcing them to turn their heads. Arghh, some family they are, not only do I have to suffer from anticipation but I also have to keep myself from gagging on my dinner from the horendous sight across from me. As I was the last person to come down from dinner I got the unlucky honor of sitting across from him, I mean my brother-in-law Michael. Aparantly, Michael has unaturally large gums and slightly wider gaps between his teath. The whole night, and I mean the whole night, we played a game of "let's-see-how-much-crap-Michael-can-dig-out-of-his-teeth-with-his-fork", the first one who vomits loses. I was definately coming in second place. 

Just as my brother-in-law picked out a HUGE piece of green spinach from his teeth and I was about to vomit my entire meal all over the table because there was no spinach at dinner tonight, my mom spoke.

"Oh, Carmella I can't wait any longer to tell you, if I do it will kill me."

Everyone turned to her, shocked to hear her speak. I just stared at her, unsure if I really wanted to know but then determining that anything was better than Michael.

"Sweetheart, your getting married!" All I could hear was a squeal, and it definately wasn't mine.