Anada (Book #3)

Monster

(This entire chapter was written by SETwrites . Thanks again Sarah!)
I'm sitting on my barely made, messy bed staring into the abyss of my thoughts. Everything coming in flashes from our last mission. My inhuman roar. My friends, my team looking at me with fearfulness in their eyes. And Elias. I-I hurt Elias. I pinned him down and he was terrified and in pain!

It's been a few days since the mission and I've been in my room since. Whenever Reina brings me any meals, she tries to start a conversation but I still feel like I can't look or talk to anyone. So she quietly leaves every time, at first with a hurt expression but now she either hides her ache or is numb to it. Just like me, I bear this numbness. I experience everything and nothing all at the same time.

I'm a coward for that. Most importantly I'm a monster. I couldn't control myself. I hurt people who are so dear to me.

I tried and still failed once again searching my mind for answers of what happened during the fog.

What did I do?

The most I know is after we got back home Elias had an arm sling. He entered my room the next morning and tried to talk to me. Explain everything but he was wearing that sling.

He struggled to convince me that it wasn't my fault. That I didn't do that to him. But I know. I know I did that to him. I might not remember but I could sense it.

I broke down. Tears fell from my eyes. He seemed so startled by my reaction but there was care and concern in his eyes. I told him to get out which he refused but he did once I forced him out the door.

He still came every day only after lunch. He would knock on my door and say "Anada?" He would wait for me to open the door or even say something allowing him to come in but I did nothing. Until today.

It's after lunch, I just finished my meal. I wait for him to come and knock on my door like usual. But he doesn't come.

I can't wait any longer so I get dress in some decent enough to walk outside clothes and exit my room. I fly down the stairs and ask the first person I could find, Westen, where Elias is.

"Elias? Um, yeah. I think he went for a walk on the beach. Wait, hey! Anada!" Westen yells while I run out from the kitchen and run out the front door as soon as he answered my question.

I sprint through the forest toward the beach and stop once I hit the open sandy beach. Looking around I spot Elias walking a few ways down the beach with his back turned away from me.

"Eliiiiaaaasssss!" I shout trying my very best to get his attention even jumping up and down waving my hands. But he's still walking and doesn't turn around in spite of everything I've done.

So I dash toward him at full dragon speed, but I trip on a random rock and end up knocking into his back sending us both down.

"Ow," I murmur. We had hit the sand pretty hard.

"Anada?" Elias asks truly amazed yet happy to see me. His heartbeat was thumbing rapidly. I must've given him a heart attack.

He pulls a pair of earbuds out of his ears. Elias doesn't even stop the music on his iPhone, but keeps his eyes focused on me.

A hint of a smile crossed my face. I'm always happy to see him, but the faint grin was wiped away as I remembered how viciously I had attacked this person and my other teammates. I immediately spring up and back away a few steps.

"I... I'm sorry. For everything," I quickly say as I brush the sand off the front side of my body.

"No, it's fine," He says while trying to step closer. One of his arms has a wrist brace on it now rather than an arm sling. He probably healed from his injury a bit.

As I keep my distance, I sigh, "No, it's not. Whenever I get hurt, you blame yourself. Well, now you're hurt, and even worse, I attacked our teammates. Elias, I am not worthy of even being on this team any longer. I can't control myself."

He shakes his head and replies, "No, you didn't. And you are worthy. The one who is at fault is Leon. Him and that staff."

"I could've killed you, Elias," I say in a low yet audible voice.

Elias stops and takes a deep breath. I glance at the ocean and deliberate whether it would've been better if I had never joined the team in the first place or met Elias. I should've stayed in the ocean as a lone dragon.

Elias starts talking and I look back at him, "Anada, you had no way to prevent Leon from doing what he commanded you to do. Please, stop telling yourself that it was your fault."

"But I should've been stronger or at least remained in control."

Elias smiles slightly then tells me, "You are strong. You're just as strong as Westen. Possibly even stronger."

He continues, "Like I was saying, you should not blame yourself. I don't want to hear you say that again, okay?"

I raise an eyebrow then frown, "I still hurt you. That doesn't make what I did any better."

Elias gives me a puzzled look then glances down at his iPhone to look at the time then over at his arm brace, "You didn't do that. I did it."

I then give him a bewildered expression.

He gives me a genuine smile, "I was furious at Leon for what he did and punched him. I ended up breaking my wrist in the process that's why that arm sling was necessary for me to wear for a few days."

I couldn't help, but smile at that. Typical Elias.

"I still feel bad for what I did to you guys," I keep my eyes on the sand peeking out from under my bare feet. I had forgotten to put shoes on, again.

I hear him step forward. My instincts told me to stay away for his own protection. I felt like I was a threat to him.

He grabs my hands then tells me with excitement in his eyes, "We can fix that."