Fallen

Chapter 30

I woke up the next day to the sun shining in my face from a crack in the curtain. I grumble to myself before fully opening my eyes. I lay in silence for a while, debating what to do. I decided I wanted to see Conor again, learn more about what we have been through together. Just because I don’t remember doesn’t mean I don’t want to know. I want to know everything about what we’ve done. There was a little tap at my door and smiled but my face dropped when it wasn’t who I wanted it to be.

“Oh hey Ally, can I help you?” Ally was my regular nurse who I adored, she was so nice to me.

“No sweetie, just making sure that you’re alright,” she gave me a little smile before opening the curtains fully. “Can I get you anything…something to eat or drink maybe?” I shook my head at her.

“I was wondering if you could get someone for me though, I’d really like to see them, his names Conor…umm…I can’t remember his last name…but I know he’s in room 5b!” She gave me a toothy grin before nodding her head and leaving the room. I was left in silence for a while until Conor came bursting through the doors. He smiled when he saw me and came and sat next to me on the chair beside my bed. “I want to know more.” He put his hands up in a surrendering way.

“Woah (Y/N), I’ve just walked in.” He gave me a little wink before he began to speak again. “So what do you want to know.” I beamed at him and shook my head.

“Everything…” he smiled at me and began to tell me about our little life we had with each other.

“Well a few days after the party, I remember meeting you and your friend, Gemma, in Costa…” Conor talked for ages. He told me little things we had done and things that we done that took a lot of explaining. I began to blush when he told me about the night we had sex for the first time.

“You were so beautiful…that was one of the best nights of my life.” He grabbed my tiny hand in his and looked up at me through his long lashes. I raised an eyebrow at him.

“Only ONE of the best nights of your life?” he nodded at me. “Well what were the others then?” He gave me a warm smile and continued.

“Well the best night of my life…was when you first told me you loved m-me…” his voice cracked a bit at the end and I knew he was trying to hold back all the emotions he was feeling right now. I cupped his cheek in my hand and he looked me deep in the eye. “I’d waited so long to here you say that and when you did…my heart skipped a beat (Y/N)…” A tear rolled down my cheek. How could I forget someone so sweet and pure as this boy in front of me? Why him? “I love you (Y/N)…” More tears ran down my face as Conor rested his head on the edge of the bed, my hand still in his. “I want things to go back the way they were before. Us being together in bed just holding each other as we fell asleep together…I want it so bad again. I love you so much-” Conor was cut off by a sob that escaped his mouth. “I’m sorry, I have to go.” He got up from his seat and walked to the door. I grabbed his hand and he quickly turned away.

“Conor, I want to know more, please stay…” He shook his head.

“If you’re not going to remember, whats the point? We’re not going to receive any positive outcome here, the doctors told us that. You won’t ever remember me so why are we both still trying? WHATS THE POINT?!” He raised his voice and I dropped his hand.

“Because I WANT to remember. I want to remember how I used to feel about you. I want to remember everything we did together. I do. I really do.” I began smashing my hands onto my head and Conor pinned them down. The tears uncontrollably falling rapidly down my face. “BUT IT’S NOT COMING BACK AND I’M SCARED! I want my life back so much Conor. I just want it back.” Conor pulled me into his chest and I just sobbed for which seemed like hours. Conor finally broke the silence.

“I want you to remember to…I’m sorry I shouted at you…Do you want me to tell you more?” I gently nodded my head. “Well budge over then.” I looked at him not knowing if he was being serious or not. He was. I moved to the side of the bed, making room for Conor. “Okay well after we…” Conor carried on for hours and I laughed, cried and gasped at the things he told me. We seemed to of had quite an active relationship.

***

“And that’s how we got here today…” Conor had told me everything. It was 9:30pm when we had finished and nurses had been bugging us all day. Even when one women came in I told her not so politely to go away as Conor was telling me about the situation with his brother.

“He pushed you over and cut your hands up real bad, look.” He lifted my hands up and showed me a shiny pink scar across one of my hands.

“Where is he now?” Conor hesitated slightly before he told me.

“He’s sorta…dead.”

“Good.”  My reaction shocked Conor a bit but in the end he just laughed.

“Conor I’m tired.” Conor got up to leave but I grabbed his arm. “No don’t go. Stay with me?” He smiled before laying back down and I let him share my blanket with me. He hesitated for a second but eventually pulled me in and wrapped me in his arms. I tensed a little but eventually relaxed and let my eyes snap shut. The last thing I remember is Conor kissing my forehead before whispering in my ear.

“I love you.”