When I'm Gone ( Nate Maloley AU)

Aftertaste: Chapter Eleven

Hayden's POV:

I go through my phone. Cameron called the guys. He told them the situation, Nate is flying out to see me. The others will stay in LA until I come home. The doctors decided I'll stay for the week.

"Hayden?"

I look up and see Nate. I look away. He's going to blame himself. Cam gets up and leaves. Nate pulls a chair up to my bed, but I can't face him.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, "I should've gone after you."

I can't face him. He sighs and takes my hand. I pull away quickly.

"Do you want me to leave? cause I will."

"Do you know that I can't walk?"

I look at him. I'm pissed that he doesn't ask how I'm taking things. Nate looks hurt, like I could care when he almost got me killed.

"I didn't know that, I'm sorry," he whispers with guilt evident on his face.

"You didn't try hard enough and I felt hopeless when you left. You didn't tell the others, Nate! You could've told them. You've lost all my trust."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"Yes."

With that Nate got up, and left the room.

•••

"Hayden."

"Cameron, he hurt me. He didn't try!"

He sighs, and hugs me. There's a small knock and I look at Nate who never left. I glare at him, and Cameron stands.

"Nate, now is not a good time."

"I need to say something to her in private, please Cam."

I cross my arms as Cameron leaves the room. Nate sighs and sits beside me.

"I should've protected you, I understand that. But I will do anything for you until you walk again. If that involves me never being in your life again then I can do that."

I shut Nate up by kissing him softly. He smiles and kisses back.

"Get me out of this hell hole, and I'll think about being your girlfriend again."

Nate nods and kisses me again softly.

•••

They allowed me to leave to go back home, but everyday I have to go to physical therapy. We arrived home several hours ago. Johnson was the first one to hug me as I arrived in the door. They gave me the guest room on the main floor and had it the exact way my room was upstairs.

Sam looked at me guiltily. I knew he was scared to face me again. Jack G helped me on my bed. Nash was no where to be found. I lay in bed. Feeling numb, not physically, but emotionally.

I cry silently. I never thought I'd come home safe, or come home at all. I asked that they leave me alone for several hours. Jack was bringing me water, and food. He gave me my pain medicine when I needed it. I wasn't allowed visitors.

They all took care of me except for Sam who wouldn't come near me. Cameron and Nate took turns to watch me. They were all too protective.

My pain medication finally hits me, causing exhaustion to hit me hard. I shut my eyes falling asleep.

Nate's POV:

He looks as she sleeps. That's really all she can do. He didn't want her to take him back. He didn't want her to be with someone who didn't even protect her.

He looked at her chair at the foot of her bed. Nate sighs when he looks at her sleeping body. She's terrified for the future. She was terrified to go to physical therapy and be told she can never walk again.

Hayden whispers something before clutching the sheets. Nate races over and takes her hand. She calms down and grips Nate's hand.

The boys are throwing a party tonight. Nate declined to join. He locked her door. These pills will knock her out until morning, and until then, Nate wouldn't leave her side.

"I love you, Nate," she whispers in her sleep and griping his hand.

He smiles to himself. Someone unlocked the door and Sammy stands in the doorway. His eyes bloodshot by tears.

"Can I see her?" He whispers, scared she'll wake and try to push him away.

Nate nods and watches as Sam takes his sisters hand. He whispers things to her, and to himself.

"I messed up so bad," Sam says, "I didn't protect her like I was supposed to."

"You did your best, Sam."

Sam leaves as people fill the house for the party. Cameron sneaks in and shuts the door. He joins Nate as they watch the sleeping girl.

She cries out again and Nate takes her hand. She jolts up and cringes away from Nate.