chapter 25: it hurts

133 9 11
                                    

I sobbed silently. Unable to control my tears from falling. I couldn't understand why Kai left me, why he walked out on me.

My heart ached and I laid on the floor crying. It hurt

It hurt like crazy.

"Emelie" a warm voice mumbled as it approached me "are you okay?"

Jamie hovered over me, her face full of concern as she is unsure of what to do. She paced around the room before running out. I hadn't taken much notice to her.

My mind replayed Kai's face over and over again.  He was horrified when I mentioned Jay. He looked beyond hurt to the point he couldn't even look at me. Why?

Does he hate me? Does he not love my any longer? I feared that he hates me and my heart ached even more. I brought my knees to my chest and hurled up into a ball.

The door creaked and opened, I refused to look.  "Em.." a familiar voice whispered before I felt my whole body being lifted. My head hit against his chest as he laid me on the bed and wrapped his arms around me.

"What happened?" He asked. He was concerned.

I couldn't speak.

Nate sighed and cupped my face and forced me to look at him. "What did he do to you?"

Mt lips quivered before my tears rolled down. "He- he left" I cried into his arms.

In that moment Alex came back in. He  came rushing to my side in a panic. "What happened?" He asked.

I sobbed into Nate's chest as he whispered something to Alex.  They both stayed silent as I began to feel my eye lids becoming heavy. My eyes closed and sleep took over me.

"What happened?" Alex voice rang in my ear.

I woke up from my sleep but continued to keep my eyes closed. I didn't want them to fuss over me anymore.

"I found her crying and totally out of it all on the floor" Nate replied with a heavy sigh.

"She said Kai left"

They both stayed silent for a while. "I didn't want her to find out" Alex began. My body tensed at his words. How much more secrets was he keeping from me?

"What are you talking about?" Nate asked.

Alex paused for a moment before he began to talk. "3 years ago Emelie witnessed the death of her best friend and first love"

My heart ached and I held back my tears as he continued to speak. "He was involved in gangs and they turned on him when he wanted out. Emelie blames herself for it but it was never her fault. She was just someone in the middle of it all"

I bit my lip, forcing myself from whimpering. I blamed myself for all these years. It was my fault if I refused to go to the beach.  They wouldn't have caught him if we were there in the first place.  It was all my fault

"Kai" Alex spat. "She has no idea who he is and I wanted to keep it that way"

My heart raced at his name. What was he talking about?

"What do you mean?" Nate asked after a long silence "did she know him when she was younger?"

"Yeah" Alex whispered. "He's Jay's half-brother"

I felt the whole world came crashing down. Everything that I knew felt like lies. Kai was Jay's half brother. 

This was why Kai left me. He couldn't stand to look at me because I reminded him of Jay. He couldn't look at me.

I silently sobbed, unable to control myself any longer.

"She met him a few times when she'd go with Jay to visit him" Alex continued.

"Why doesn't she remember him?" Nate asked.

"Because she's been blocking it all out"

I closed my eyes. Shaking my head. All this time, I thought I couldn't remember. It was never that but it was me, I was blocking it out. Jay's death and everything that relates to him, I blocked it all out to forget.

I didn't want to remember

And for Kai it must've been the same. He's been blocking it all out and I brought the memories back for him.

"This is so fucked up" Nate sighed in frustration "what happens now?"

There was a long silence until Alex spoke. "I'm taking her back home"

My eyes opened and I rose up from the bed. Both Alex and Nate rushed over to me. I wanted to tell him that I didn't want to go but all I could think about was Kai.

"You alright?" Alex asked. I nodded "I'm fine" I managed to say.

He sighed in relief and rubbed my head. "You gave me a scare"

I faked a smile and shook my head "sorry"

Nate was leaning against the door. His face showed concern. I smiled at him to reassure that I was fine.

"Emelie" Alex began and I knew exactly what he was going to say. "Lets go home"

"Yeah" I replied without a single hesitation. He was surprised at first but smiled. "Just me and you OK? I'll come and pick your things up later"

I nodded and held his hand as he pulled me up. I blanked out everything else and just followed Alex as he dragged me out. Nate was trailing behind.

I just wanted to get away. I just wanted to be alone.

"You sure you won't regret it?" Nate asked as we stood outside while Alex talked to the principle.

"I just don't want to hurt anymore" I whispered to him. I just didn't want to hurt Kai anymore.

Nate pulled me into a long embrace whilst Alex brought the car over. "I love you" he mumbled in my hair. "You're my best friend"

I sniffed and held back the tears "and you're mine too"

He chuckled lightly before kissing my cheek "I'll visit you okay?"

I nodded "you have to"

I said my final goodbye before getting into the passenger seat.  I looked up at the school building for the final time before Alex drove away.

I couldn't hold back the tears and leaned my heat against the window.

For a moment my eyes caught someone. He was walking back to the school grounds.  He looked up and he's eyes caught mine.

I reached my hand out but he was too far.

He was too far from my reach

He's too far.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

*authors note*

So Emelies left for good and she realised that Kai was too far from her.  She couldn't reach him.

Why am I crying with her haha

Thanks for reading guys!

Bad Boy, Bad Attitude& Good LipsOpowieści tętniące życiem. Odkryj je teraz