My Very Own Alpha

Chapter 19 - No Holding Back

Harmony POV

I stood there staring down Carson and Jessica, when her hand went out and laid on his chest I stepped towards her and growled. Carson pushed her hand off giving her a look before he looked back at me. When I seen he had a mask on over all his emotions it ripped through my last bit of hope and I snapped. "No please, leave her hand on there, dont take it off because of me, God knows its been there and many other places before me and it will after me." I stopped when Mikes hand grabbed mine and tugged. I turned and gave him a sad smile, trying to tell him I needed to do this.

"Harmony, dont, you dont have to.." I cut him off when he pulled on my hand harder. I slipped my hand out of his and looked at him ignoring Carsons growl, served that S.O.B right i thought. "Mike, I know, I dont have to do anything, but I do.. I have to do this. I cant just take it anymore, its." my voice broke and I shook my head at him before meeting his gaze, "its killing me Mike." I whispered for his ears only. He stepped forward and placed a small kiss on my forhead before nodding and stepping back. I inhaled deeply bringing up the anger and hurt I have been through not only from Carson but from my parents death, though he had nothing to do with it, I knew i needed everybit of determination I could get."

When I felt my blood flowing rapidly I turned back to face Carson, ignoring the hurt that was clear on his face. If anything it angered me more, "Dont do that Carson, dont show me your emtions only when its fucking conveient for you!" I screamed and took another step towards them, "dont punish Mike when he has been the only one there for me, looking out for me, taken care of me, holding me when I cry, OVER YOU! Where were you at in that sluts bed, or in anothers, yeah I am not stupid, since I am the poor neglected Mate people think its funny to tell me everything they do with the Alpha, the mate that dont want me." I raised my hand when he went to speak, "dont, dont, talk to me, you have nothing I want to hear. You have said enough and now it is my turn, listen and listen closely."

I inhaled and felt my heart shattering, my wolf began to plead with me, 'Harmony he is an ass, but dont do this, reject him and we will never find love.' I felt sorry for her, and myself, I truly did. But I knew she was right, the rejection would hurt her more then me, but we would never be happy with a mate like Carson. Tears brimmed my eyes when I looked back up to meet his, my voice was shaky and my hands were clinched to keep from reaching out to him, begging him to fix it. "I Harmony, Daughter of Alpha William and Luna Samantha ..." I stopped to steady my breath feeling my heart shatter even more. " I rej."

My words were cut off when Carsons lips crashed down on mine, hard, angry, hurt and demanding. I shoved him away only from sheer shock. I seen the surprise in his eyes as he steadied hisself and stepped back up infront of me. His face was angry, his body shook and his eyes were black, his wolf was taking over. "Harmony," his voice came out rough and cold. Making me shiver from the sound of it. "YOU. WILL. NOT. REJECT. ME" He bit out everyword and his Alpha voice rang through and clear. Though I was not in his pack, and myself came from Alpha bloodlines I wouldnt normally listen to an Alpha command. But because of the mating bond, he had rule over me.

Anger raised in me unlike ever before. I began to lash out and hit him reapeatedly in his chest screaming the whole time. "FUCK YOU CARSON, why cant I reject you, its not like your a mate worth a damn, its not like you care.." My voice lowered as tears flowed down my cheeks but I didnt stop hitting him or ranting on. "you dont care about anything but yourself and your whores!"

He grabbed my arms and pulled me until I was right infront of him, his eyes burned down on me. "Enough Harmony, I mean it, thats enough." Pain and anger were shattering my chest, I swallowed my pain and met his glare with my own. Though his face was blurry because of the tears I didnt look away or back down. "Is this what you want? Is this how you want your mate to feel? Are you happy now, I damn well hope so because this is all because of you, because you couldnt keep it in your pants or agree to only have one woman, I am sorry I am not the fake blonde like little bitch over there, but I would of loved you like no one else." His grip loosened on my arms and one of his hands wiped a tear off my cheek.

I jerked my head back and looked at him again blinking away the tears that now flowed freely down my face. "Carson," my voice was barely a whisper, the fight inside me was dying down and all I felt was pain, "Carson please, please, you are killing me."

Carson POV

My heart was barely beating as Harmony went on at me, I didnt know what to do. Her tears were washing away any reason or thought I had for my actions, they suddenly seemed stupid. I was lost in my own self pitty when her last words hit me like a ton of bricks, her voice was soft and weak, "please Carson you are killing me." I lost all my control, I ran my fingers up her face and wiped away her tears. The one thing I said I didnt want to happen was happening. I pulled her into my chest, though she tried to push away I wouldnt let her, no way in hell was I letting her go again.

"Oh little one." My voice was rough and raw with emotion, emotions, I havent let out until now. I held her tight planting kisses on her head and inhaling her scent trying to calm myself down. No longer caring who was in the kitchen with us, I needed to tell her, I was literally words away from losing her. With all the stregnth I had left I pulled her away from me, just enough to look down at her tear stained face and red eyes. "Little one, listen to me, I am so sorry, I didn't mean for this to happen, I truly didn't, the only reason I did what I did was for you to be happy, for both of us to be happy. Please please, I am begging you. Let me explain."

What felt like hours passed as she stood there looking up in my eyes. For once I didnt hide my feelings, I showed her everything, the pain, the guilt, the worry, the love, the fear of loosing her. She gave me a shaky head nod. That was all I needed, I pulled her aginst me and felt my heart swell when her arms wrapped around my waist. I planted kisses down her head to her neck and stopped by her ear, "you are so strong my little mate, so much stronger then me."

......We shall see! :) sorry, but I am exhausted and headed to bed! Vote, comment and enjoy! >>> picture of Carson holding Harmony when she was crying! :'( I will update tomorrow if you enjoy it! :))