Book Reviews! (CLOSED)

Beautiful Cries

Novel by Lyssagirl7686
Genre: Fantasy

Cover: The cover is just amazing. The contrasting and lighting that is showed in the picture really makes your cover eye caching. The font is beautiful and easy to read. The sticker that you have placed on the cover also ties in well with the entire image. It doesn't cover anything important or draw attention from anything else.

Summary: Your summary is short and to the point. It's also very well written and styled. You don't seem to have nay grammar mistakes so your good on that. There's really nothing to say since it's really good. Soooooooo, we'll move on...

Characters: Your characters are depicted very well. You use their surroundings as another way to show their personality which is what the best authors learn to do.

ALENA: okay so the story starts off with Alena losing Persephone and then being cursed forever. From the way she deals with all of this shows that she's really honestly guilty of what she's done. She really was true friends with Persephone and this whole moment of her kneeling down in pain is shown very well and it made me feel for her. I was so in pain when she was.

DIMITRI: At first I was so confused as to who this character was but as you showed me, the reader, more back story and personality connected to him made me like him instantly. This whole dad died, has to take care of sister, and crazy mom thing, really helps bring out his character more without bombarding the reader with so much information.

OTHERS: When working with so many characters it can become hard to shows each characters personality without making the reader feel like they have to write each character name down in order to remember. You write and explain your characters in such way that their personality sticks into the readers mind. Making us love or either hate the character. Which is what you want to happen.

Plot: WOW. That's all I have to say.

Okay I lied. I'm here to review so that's what I will do. Let's see your plot is organized very well, each chapter flows perfectly with the other and your descriptions help bring this world of yours to life. The way you strategically place these different events happening in Alena's life are amazing. They give the story an extra ZAZZ.

Is that a word? Eh who cares?

Anyways your story really seems to be going somewhere rather than confusing everyone who stumbles upon your story. So YAY!

Grammar: You're actually pretty good when it comes to grammar and that sort of stuff, but I did notice one thing you did quite often throughout chapters 1-5. For example on chapter one you write:

"Mother worries far too much, as do you my dearest friend," Persephone laughed, basking in the rays of the beating sun, "Now I must go..."

In this phrase you have Persephone speaking twice and in the middle you add in some description. Now this is a really common thing for authors to do, it gives an author's story more filling, but the problem is your punctuation setting. You see the first quote said by Persephone is a complete thought, therefore it should end with a period NOT a comma.

If you ever stumble upon a phrase that DOES require a comma then you need to make sure to start your next quote with a lower cased letter.

That seems to be the only type of mistake I found so read through your chapters carefully and fix that problem :)

Extra Info You Might Want to Know (Not really): I love Persephone. Her myth is my favorite.

I ship Alena and Dimitri together. Seeing how they haven't spoken to each other once means this ship shouldn't even exist, but it does because I can feel it happening.

Note from Me!

Beautiful Cries is a wonderful story. I would gladly recommend it to anyone because of how perfectly portrayed it is. Don't be surprised if I happen to drop by from time to time because it's definitely something I will continue to read.

Any questions!! Tips or suggestions on what I can do to improve my reviews, feel free to comment below. Until next time!

-Esmer