Surviving Love

Chapter 1

As the night sky fades into darkness I sit there staring into space wondering if I should go along with my plan, the plan to leave everything behind and become who I used to be, a strong person not broken as everyone sees me here after everything that has happened.

I see my family laughing and enjoying life when I'm just sitting here wishing I could be the same. I've been planning to leave for a while. I just need some time away, a break from who I am now. Tonight, is the night. I'm going to do it just pack the essentials and get on a plane. I've been saving for a while not knowing what for, but now I know this is my time to become what I used to be. Happy.

I should probably get down to who I am. I am Mia, I'm 21 years old. Compared to my family of giants I am 5ft 3" whilst the rest of my family is nearly 6 foot. I have long brown hair and big blue eyes. I have now made the decision to leave my family to start again in a place no one knows who I am rather than staying somewhere that people either pity me or believe I'm a liar.

I do love everyone around me, I'm not leaving because I don't. I'm leaving because I need to find myself again and it may seem stupid for some people but not me. I have had a rocky past and I feel like I lost myself along the way.

I disappear from the family gathering to get things in order I have a bag of essentials, clothes, toiletries, etc. and I have secured a room in New York, it is dirt cheap so I'm not expecting much at all. Once I'm there the plan is to find a job. I have enough money to last me as long as I find a job pronto.

I've written a note of my plans to leave for my family to read as soon as I have left.

"Mia what are you doing?". My mom Annette bellows my family is not quiet, A brief example of how we are different, I am reserved and quiet, my family on the other hand is not.

I make my way downstairs and say bye to my family not that they know it's a real goodbye. My auntie Elle is the only one who knows of my plan and has encouraged me to do what is right for me. We share a look of understanding and she whispers telling me to stay safe.

I walk away from all of them and have a nap, I don't sleep well at all, all my sleep consists of are the crippling nightmares which cause the massive bags under my eyes which I always conceal from my family so they don't worry, I just wish I could have a good night's sleep but it doesn't happen. Oh well.

I wake up shaking, no one knows about my nightmares that is one secret of many I keep hidden from people. In the nightmares, I felt a punch in the gut and this used to be my reality but no more and this is the real reason I need to leave.

It's 5:00 am I need to make a move if I'm going, I grab my bag and put my earphones in. Music helps me drown out all of the noise.

I reach the airport and take a deep breath, I can do this.

I hate planes I find them crowded and claustrophobic. The plane starts to set off and I'm feeling terrified, I know I needed to get out of this town but now it is becoming a reality I am so nervous. The music carries on playing in my ears calming me down from the massive step I've just taken.

I have just left everyone behind.

I'm quite shocked I've actually done it, I'm normally a person who does what everyone else wants me to do, it's what I'm used to being controlled but here I am .... free.

After a while the people sitting next to me start standing and I have arrived in New York. It's so strange being here such big buildings. I feel so small. I had to get directions from someone to arrive at the apartment that I have rented a room from.

As I expect the exterior looks run down and apparently, I'm sharing with someone else which is news to me. I timidly knocked on the door worried about what I had got myself into and ... no one answers this is just my luck. I phone the guy I'm renting it off and no answer.