we make love (and love falls apart)

21. Verbalise

Camila doesn't expect it to happen again. She figures that making out on the couch with Lauren is just a one-time thing, and that they'll forget it ever happened and things will go back to the way they were before; Camila pining over Lauren, and the older girl being both painfully oblivious and painfully straight.

Things go back to normal for a few days, but then they're told that they're staying in a hotel for the night. Camila's thankful for that – tour buses don't come equipped with place to take a nice bubble bath – and she's not even really paying attention when she's told that she'll be rooming with Lauren.

She's still thinking about the relaxing bath she's going to take later on the way up to the hotel room, but the thought is knocked out of her mind when their hotel room door closes behind them and Lauren practically pins her to it, and kisses her roughly.

It's different from the first time. That'd been simple curiosity.

This time, she can practically feel the lust radiating from Lauren, and she knows that this is moving way too fast.

As much as it aches her to do it, she pulls away. "That- I'm not ready for anything drastic, Lo. I- I know it's not a secret that I'm inexperienced, but it's not like-"

"Shut up," Lauren kisses her again, but this time it's a lot softer. "I don't want that from you. You deserve a perfect first time and I can't give you that. I just want to kiss you."

Camila frowns. "Why?"

Lauren shakes her head. "Do I need a reason?"

Camila wants to say yes. She wants to verbalise her thoughts, bear her soul, tell Lauren how much she likes her, and how much this all means to her. Kissing might not mean a lot to Lauren, but it means a lot to Camila.

But it's like she's already addicted to the sweet taste of Lauren's soft, plump lips. And she knows telling Lauren she has feelings for her will put a stop to whatever this is. So, she silently shakes her head and lets Lauren kiss her again.