1 - You gotta do what you gotta do

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Vivian

"It's your twenty-fifth birthday V, why are you so quiet?" One of my friends, Loren asked making my other two closest friends, Alex and Terri looked at me for my answer. I let a small sigh. I guess they forgot what tomorrow is.

"I understand it's my birthday and it's my twenty-fifth like you said. I'm just trying to prepare myself for tomorrow." I responded drinking a glass of champagne.

"Tomorrow?" they all said.

"Cryobank," I said simply. they all stared at me. "What?" I asked, whats wrong with me going to a sperm bank?

"Why are you going to a sperm bank? you're not getting--" Terri stopped her sentence and gasped.

"Yes I'm getting an ICSI, I want a child. I'm already twenty-five, I have more than enough money to take care of one, I own my father's restaurant. And the last time I had a relationship-- was what? three years ago. I told myself when I turn twenty-five, I want to get pregnant. I'm still sticking to that" I said.

"Your still young V!" Loren said. I shrugged my shoulders. I'm twenty-five. in five more years I'll be thirty. I think this is a great time for me to get pregnant. It's probably not the best option and not what I promised myself. I wanted to be in a committed relationship then bring a child into the world. since that obviously hasn't happened I'm going for the last resource available.

"Why don't you just have unprotected sex with a random guy. it's basically the same concept right?" Loren went on.

"I don't want to have sex with some stranger! What kind of shit is that? It's not the same concept." I answered. Sometimes this girl is just clueless.

"So injecting sperm into an egg isn't the same if you have sex with a guy and he cums in you? It is going the same place, you know? having sex is safer! no needles." She argued.

"I understand it's safer but I've already set up my appointment for tomorrow. I got my donor's information; it says it is my choice if I want to contact him IF I get pregnant. but I have to wait until that happens or if it does."

"Well, I hope it works. Want me to come with?" Alex smiled. I nodded in response. I really need somebody there for me.

"Whats your donor name?"

"Christian or Christopher I don't know" I mumbled. they all nodded their heads and we went back to celebrate my birthday. A few hours later our night out ended and we went our separate ways; I went home to nothing in particular while all my friends went home to husbands or boyfriends with kids. I have nothing, this is the reason why I want a child.

It was a thirty-minute drive from the restaurant to get to my two story home. I pulled into the garage grabbing my take out bag and purse. I shut the door then locked it, I made it to the front door messing with my set of keys finally I came across my house keys. I opened the door and set all of my stuff onto the dining room table then throwing my jacket onto the couch.

Silence.

Pure silence is all you here in my home. No boyfriend or husband staying up making sure I got home safely. No kids running to the door waiting for 'mommy' to get here. I have everything I could possibly want when it comes to money. I'm not afraid to say that most of my relationships failed miserably because I'm a workaholic. because of its true. Unlike others, I wanna be set for life. And after all those years I'm finally am. I can start with other responsibilities but I clearly don't have enough time to find the love of my life. I'm done with love when it comes to men. I guess a child would take that position and let me know I have something.

I kicked off my heels, walking barefooted into the kitchen to put my food up. I grabbed a glass and got some water out of the faucet and pop one of the vitamins I'm supposed to take to make my chances of the ICSI higher. Placing the glass on the counter, I grabbed my phone and purse and took it into my bedroom. I placed my phone on the charger next to my bed and stripped out of my clothes throwing them into the hamper. I got my robe and a towel then made my way to my bathroom; a steamy hot shower is well needed right now. the best way to end my birthday.

After my almost forty-five minute shower, I was squeaky clean. I stepped out of the tub letting the air hit my skin and creating goosebumps. I dried off the best way I could then braiding my hair while it was still wet. When I reached my bedroom I threw on a t-shirt not caring for underwear or a bra. I'm alone so what the point.

~~

I woke up at 11 am, Unlike myself really but I guess I was really tired because I'm a morning person. I got out of bed making it to the bathroom to handle my business. After taking a bird bath since I took a shower last night I got dressed in some leggings and a sweatshirt. I look like a complete fool and i never leave out the house like a bum but they said to wear something comfy; so this is as comfy I'm getting. I grabbed a Banana on the way out along with my keys and purse. I saw that Alex was in my driveway waiting for me. I locked the door after me than getting into the passenger seat of her car. We said our hello's then she pulled out of my driveway making our way downtown.

We pulled up in front of the building of the Cryobank. I let out a deep breath before getting out of the car, Alex did the same. "You ready?" she asked. I nodded and we proceeded on going inside. I was soon signed in then called into a private room. I change into a provided outfit and sat on the little bed. The room was pure silence, I stared at all the posters on the walls saying how this works. Not even a few minutes later, there was a knock and a male came inside.

"Hi, my name is Dr. Killie. And your Vivian right?" He asked. I nodded before smiling. He looked over to Alex who waved lightly. "Are you two in together? is this a lesbian couple?" He asked looking over his paperwork.

I shook my head no immediately. "No no this is my best friend; we're both straight" I informed him he nodded before putting all the stuff down. He had a container with white stuff and I'm pretty sure its sperm.

"So are you ready?" He asked. I nodded.

I got this. I can do this.

--

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