A Candle in the Darkness (A Dragon Age: Inquisition fanfiction)

A Deeply Honorable Man

12 Kingsway, 9:41

After breakfast one morning, Cullen approached Antonia as she was about to head for the training ground. "Can I speak with you later? It's ... important." He looked as nervous as she had ever seen him.

For a moment, her heart leaped in her chest, until over Cullen's shoulder she happened to catch Cassandra watching them with a concerned expression on her face. If Cassandra was concerned, and openly showing it, this conversation wasn't likely to be one Antonia would be happy about. Of course, she thought, Cassandra could be jealous—it was always possible Cassandra was attracted to Cullen. But Antonia had seen no sign of that.

"Of course," she said to Cullen. He did not look noticeably relieved by her assent, which only confirmed her suspicions that she wasn't going to like whatever he had to say.

Varric caught up to her as she left the dining hall. "You going to tell Commander Loverboy how you feel, finally?"

"I thought I asked you to stop calling him that," she hissed, looking around to be sure no one had overheard.

"That's right, you did." Varric's cheeky grin said he had taken that as a suggestion, rather than as the command it had been meant to be.

"And no. Whatever it is he wants to talk about, it looks like it would be a bad time to broach the topic."

"Really?" He raised his eyebrows. Then he said, "Oh. Huh."

"What?"

"It's just ... I have an inkling what there might be for the two of you to talk about. And if I'm right, Herald—go easy on him."

"When have I ever been hard on any of you?"

"Well, never so far, but you never can tell when someone's going to say the wrong thing and that scary equanimity of yours will snap."

Antonia frowned at him. "I have 'scary equanimity'?"

"Damn right you do. You never get mad—except in combat, but everyone does that. Why don't you ever get mad? Even Hawke got mad. Usually at Fenris; or her mother."

"Look who's talking. I've never seen you angry, either, even when Cassandra was beating you up for hiding Hawke from her."

"Point taken, Herald. Or should I call you Inquisitor? Always so hard to give up on a good nickname."

"I don't suppose I could prevail on you to call me Antonia. It does get tiresome not being called by my own name."

"Not my style."

"Well, I suppose if I have to have a nickname, I'd rather be Herald than Chuckles. Or Sparkler. Not that Dorian minds that one; I think he rather likes it."

Varric chuckled. "He likes everything, which is part of his charm." He paused near the table, cozily placed in front of the fire, where he kept his writing things. "This is where I leave you. Don't you have an appointment higher up?"

"Later, he said. And strangely, I don't find myself in a hurry." Antonia glanced apprehensively in the direction of Cullen's office.

"Don't make him wait too long."

With the dwarf's advice ringing in her ears, Antonia set out across the courtyard. She spoke to the merchants for a bit, long enough to watch Cullen mounting the stone stairs to his office. His steps were slow, a far cry from his usual brisk pace. She decided Varric was right—whatever it was, it was best to get it over with quickly.