A Candle in the Darkness (A Dragon Age: Inquisition fanfiction)

Blackwall

27 Guardian, 9:42

The man Antonia had known as Blackwall, now revealed as an Orlesian captain and wanted traitor named Thom Rainier, sat on the edge of the cot in his prison cell, looking down at his hands.

She waited, wondering what he would say; not certain what she wanted to say.

"I didn't take Blackwall's life. I want you to know that," he said eventually. "I traded his death. He wanted me for the Wardens, but there was an ambush. Darkspawn. Blackwall was killed. I took his name so that a good man could live. But ... a good man, the man he was, wouldn't have let another man die in his place."

Antonia had been stunned to see Blackwall climb the steps to the gallows in the middle of Val Royeaux, giving himself in place of one of the men he had once commanded, who had been doomed to death by hanging for the crimes they had committed long ago. It wasn't the first inkling she'd had that something was awry in Blackwall's story—she had suspected for some time that he was not actually a Grey Warden; since their time at Adamant, in fact—but to hear him admit it had been a shock. She wasn't over it yet.

"Do you think your death will make up for what you did?"

"Isn't it a start?" Blackwall—Rainier—asked bitterly. He turned his head to look at her for the first time. "Why are you here?"

It was a good question. Why was she there? There was no reason that she should be; his crime had been against the Orlesian Empire. He ought to be their problem now. Except that he was one of her people, one of her companions. He had fought at her side, he had saved her life on more than one occasion. He had drunk ale with her and laughed with her and walked through the sodding Fade with her. How could she not be here?

But she couldn't say all of that, not in the face of his crippling despair and his evident longing for the oblivion of death. "I wanted you to know that you're not alone," she said at last.

Rainier got up and came to the bars of the cell, gripping them with all his strength. "Don't you understand what I've done?" he shouted at her. "I gave the order to kill Lord Callier, his entourage, and I lied to my men about where the order came from. When it came to light, I ran. Those men—my men—died for my treason while I was pretending to be a better man. This is what I am. A murderer ... a traitor ..." He sank to his knees in the cell. "A monster!"

Antonia stepped backward, away from his anger and his self-loathing. "I know you're more than what you say," she said. "Have some faith in yourself."

He knelt there, not looking at her, and she turned on her heel. She was angry—but at whom it was hard to say. Outside the jail, she found the little knot of Inquisition people she had brought with her, just in case.

"You, and you," she said, pointing to two soldiers. "Dodge, and Warner. You'll take turns keeping watch with the Orlesian guards. That man is an Inquisition prisoner as much as he is an Orlesian, and you will make certain he stays alive until his trial." Or until I can figure something out, she thought, but didn't say. She turned to another man, Lopes, one of Leliana's operatives. "You get a message to Skyhold immediately. Tell them I want every piece of information they have on Thom Rainier, and I want Commander Cullen here with a small unit of his best men as soon as bloody possible. Understand?"

"Yes, Inquisitor."

"Good." She stalked off. She hadn't intended on an extended stay in Val Royeaux, but she was not leaving here until this Rainier thing was resolved.

It took a few days for Cullen to get there, even at top speed, and he met her in the jail as soon as he arrived. Antonia had come to visit Rainier every day, but hadn't gotten any further with him than the first day. He treated her with grave courtesy, but refused to talk to her about his situation.

She was coming up from the cell when Cullen came in, carrying a sheaf of papers.

"Oh, good. You're here. What do we know?"

"I have Leliana's report here." He handed it to her.

Antonia leafed through it, pages covered in Leliana's tiny, careful script. She gestured for Cullen to walk with her outside, out of earshot of the jailers, Orlesian and Inquisition alike. In the sunny streets of Val Royeaux, she lifted the report. "Can you summarize?"

"Yes. Are you all right?" he asked.

"No. This is—I fought with him, Cullen, I trusted him at my back. He's the same person he was then, but he isn't." She shook her head. "Tell me what the report says."

"Apparently he was a respected captain in the Orlesian army. He was turned, persuaded to assassinate one of Celene's biggest supporters. His men, a fiercely loyal band, took the fall for it, and paid for his treason with their lives, except for a few, like Mornay," the man who had been going to hang, "who managed to escape. For a time." There was an edge to his tone.

"Thank you. That's helpful." She looked at the papers in her hand, sighing. "Or at least educational."

"Don't blame yourself," Cullen said. "We all made this mistake."

It was generous of him, but not true. She had recruited the man she thought was Blackwall; she had fought next to him. This was her fault, if fault there was. She had known something was off, and had never pushed it, wanting Blackwall to trust her enough to tell her himself. "What are my options here, Commander?"

"Blackw—Rainier has accepted his fate, but you don't have to. We do have resources." He was looking down at her, and Antonia wondered if he knew this was why she had called him here so urgently—and if he disapproved. "If you have him released to us, you can pass judgment on him yourself."

"If it were up to you, what would happen?" she asked.

Cullen's mouth curled in disgust. "What Black—that man did to his men was unacceptable. He betrayed them and left them to his fate. I despise him for it." Then he sighed, and added, "But he fought as a Warden, and for the Inquisition, shed his blood for our cause. And the moment he shakes off his past, he turns around and owns up to it. Why?"

"Some part of you is impressed by what he did, isn't it?"

"Saving Mornay the way he did took courage, I'll give him that. I can't tell you what to do, Inquisitor—I don't really know what I would do in your place." He glanced at her sideways. "But you didn't call me all the way here to ask me what I thought you should do."

"I wanted your opinion."

"But you've already decided."

"Yes." Antonia nodded firmly. "He is Inquisition; get him out of there and take him to Skyhold. I don't care how many favors it takes."

"Far be it from me to question your decision, Inquisitor, but are you certain you want to burn those favors on a man who has already betrayed one cause?" She glanced at him sharply, and Cullen said, "As your military advisor, it behooves me to point out the ramifications of your decision. If these are your orders, I will carry them out."

"Good. Because it doesn't matter what he's done. The Inquisition takes care of its own, and that includes punishing them for wrongdoing. I would want it done for a kitchen worker, much less for one of my own companions, and I will send that message today clearly enough to be heard across Thedas."

Cullen nodded. "Yes, Inquisitor."

"Let me know when you're ready to return; the rest of us will come back to Skyhold with you."

Now he smiled. "That part, at least, I look forward to."