Chapter 41

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TOBIN'S POV

The two weeks passed very fast and Christen and I got along very well. I really think that we can work and our bond is stronger then ever.
But still; Alex is the love of my life and I'm afraid that I'll want her back. I don't want to ruin things with Christen but I also loved Alex for over a year and I can't just forget her.
I wonder if she's still with that Réné guy..
What does he have what I don't? I don't get it. I thought that Alex is gay but she isn't after all. How could she lie to me about all this..

I make myself some sandwiches and turn the TV on. Christen is at her sister's house over the weekend and I'm all alone.
I watch Orange Is The New Black for the 5th time now.
Piper Chapman, the main character of the story has gotten back together with her Ex-Girlfriend Alex Vause, even though both of them hurt the other one multiple times.
Maybe there's still a chance for Alex and I?
I really like Christen but Alex is the love of my life. I just felt so unwanted and lonely the past six months that I HAD to kiss someone again. To cuddle with someone, to love someone.
But I love Alex. Gosh why is love so confusing?

-

KELLEY'S POV

It's around 6pm when my phone rings.

'Baby Horse' says it on the display.

Great. Alex calls me. What am I supposed to do? Alex is my friend but she also broke the heart of my BEST friend.

"Hope!", I shout. "Come here real quick please."
"What's the matter, honey?", she asks as she walks into the kitchen.
"Alex calls me. Should I pick it up?", I ask.
"Yeah of course! Hurry!", she says and I pick it up fastly.

"Hey Kelley. Um- I know that you probably don't want tot talk to me but please listen to what I have to say.", she mumbles nervously.
"Um okay. What's the matter?, I ask, trying to act mature. I'd rather like to yell at her for doing all this to Tobs.
"You probably won't believe me but I have to tell you something.", she says nervously.
"When I left for France, I didnmt tell Tobin because I was so afraid of loosing her in this moment. When I finally arrived in France, my new teammates asked me a lot of stuff about myself, my friends and my life in general. I-", she says but I interrupt her.
"Wait a second Alex..", I mumble and put the call on hold.
I open the recording app on my phone and start recordung our concersation.
"Sorry. I had to turn the radio off.", I lie to her as an excuse.
"So as I said, they asked me a lot of myself and I started telling them about my beautiful girlfriend when they were all shocked and whispering. I asked what was going on and they told me that the club doesn't accept LGBTQ+ people and that I couldn't tell anybody about Tobin. But one of the girls said that she will tell the federation of the club and that a few other girls were kicked out because of that before me.
So I asked what I should do because I was panicking. It would have been very bad for Tobin and me if I got kicked out and then one of the girls told me about Réné.
Réné is gay, his boyfriend Sam and he have the same problem; he plays for another club in France that doesn't accept LGBTQ+ people and we had the plan to have a 'fake-relationship'. But I-", she explains but I interrupt her again.
"You dumped Tobin for a gay guy?! All this was a FAKE?! How could you! Tobin suffered so much because of you! And it wasn't even real?! Why THE FUCK didn't you just tell her?!?!", I yell angrily.
"I- I don't know..", she cries. "I thought it would be easier if she didn't know about all this but the media caught us together so I had to tell her before she sees the photos on the internet. Kelley I love her with all my heart! I thought that it would be easier if she didn't knew but the plan got destroyed and I can't change it anymore!
I just don't know what to tell her Kelley! She would NEVER want me back again.. Kelley what should I so?!", she breaks down crying.
"Shhh Alex. It will be okay. Tobin made it through those six months and I think that the pain she felt and still feels is way painfuller than yours. She made it through and so will you because-", I stop.

Should I tell her about Christen?

"Because what?", Alex asks nervously.
"Because of what Kelley? Tell me!", she yells.
"She- um- I don't know how to tell you this Alex. She was very upset. Upset is not enough, there's not a word to describe how she felt. She didn't come to practise for two months and she didn't leave her house for a whole week after you told her about Réné. She wasn't even able to visit her mom's grave because she was so hurt.
Alex she lost a lot of weight because she didn't eat anymore. I couldn't help her because I never felt the way she did. Nobody could help her.", I start, trying to explain Alex why Tobin and Christen are together now.

I suddently feel sorry for Alex.

"But then there was Christen. Julie left her three days before you left Tobin. They spent a lot of time together because they could somehow relate. Both of their girls left them for a boy and they got over it together.
Together. That's what they are now.", I say.

"Tobin is with- Christen now?", Alex whispers and I can hear her tear up.

"I am so sorry, Alex. But-", I want to explain that the two won't last, bit she hangs up.

Hell no! What did I do? I hope she's okay. I need to show Tobin the recording!

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