Non-stop •Mute Alex•

Alexander

A/N: Co-written by OwlWithAHat

Also apparently Hercules's parents sleep as heavy as rocks because they just aren't mentioned in this chapter at all.

TW: mentions and thoughts of suicidal thoughts or actions.

Alexander's P.O.V
Shit, they found me before it was over. I should've cut deeper, I should've cut more. I should've thought of it earlier.

"Tell us what happened, amor." Lafayette said. I couldn't get a sound out, I was too busy choking on tears. Life sucks.

Lafayette pulled me into a hug, which I quickly pulled away from. I just wanted to lay there in my puddle of broken hope and die. It shouldn't have taken so long, there were enough up and down my arm that I should at least feel dizzy.

"Why won't you let us help you, Alex?" John asked, frightened for my life.

"B-because.." I managed, "because of everything." It scared me, the thought of dying. But it also calmed me in a sense that I wouldn't have to deal with the pain anymore.

"Define 'everything.'" Hercules said. I dodged the  question with silence. I'm too scared to do anything.

"The doctor should've let my burns infect. Maybe then I wouldn't still be here. You guys wouldn't be making such a fuss over me. I would be numb."

"Alex, this is the second time I've caught you like this. You can't run away from your problems." John said calmly.

"I'm not, John! I'm getting rid of the problem!" I shot back. "Guys.. everyone I've ever loved has either died, left, or become distant." I looked at John. "I don't want this to be the same. I shouldn't even be friends with you guys. I deserve nothing but solitude, by myself, where I have nothing to lose."

Lafayette pulled me into another hug, but this time I didn't pull away. I hung limply in his arms while he held me up by my head and back. My tears mysteriously stopped falling from my face, and I didn't like it. If crying was the only way to get my pain out right now then I was going to cry until I became dehydrated.

Eventually I gave up and hugged Lafayette back, burying my face in his chest. He let my bloody arm soak his night shirt and my tears ruin his perfect hair. He lifted me out of the bathtub and placed me on the toilet seat like a parent would. My friends cleaned off my face and arm telling me to calm down every once in a while when a sob exited my throat.

We didn't figure out sleeping arrangements until it was almost two o'clock. Instead of everyone passing out wherever, Lafayette insisted I stay with him. I figured they'd let me sleep by myself because I'm still possessing this disgusting body God has "so thankfully" gifted to me. Basically, I figured no one would want to sleep with a girl, but hey I'm down I guess.

~~~~~~~~~

I have to say it was weirder than I thought it would be. We were all just laying on the ground together waiting to see who would fall asleep first, which was Hercules.

I turn to look at Lafayette and whisper to him, "Listen, uh, Christ this is awkward, so nothing happens, okay? Just gotta get some sleep, and you're obviously not letting me sleep on my own after.. things. Yeah?"

"Of course, I would never take advantage of someone like that." He said simply, making me blush in embarrassment. I wasn't talking about taking advantage of me! I was talking about no spooning, no implied relationship crap. I just need somewhere to sleep ugh.

Fortunately, Lafayette and John soon followed Hercules and his pursuit of sleep. Unfortunately, Lafayette had his arms wrapped around me with my head firmly tucked under his chin. How can someone sleep like this? I tried shifting slightly into a more comfortable position. This just triggered Lafayette to wrap his arms tighter around me and turn on his side. Great, now we're spooning.

I eventually gave up and let sleep consume me. Bad idea.

Looking around, I realize I'm in the hospital again. But I look like I just came out of the bathroom a few moments ago, with numerous slits up and down my arm and blood stains on my shirt. It looks like I just came out of a horror movie.

I see my friends surrounding me. They're all talking over each other, as if they can't hear the rest talking. I try talking to them, but it's just the same. The setting shifts slightly and the nurse is in my room with a mask over her face. It's not like I have a disease or something lady take it off.

Looking around the room this time revealed the souls of presumably deceased people that died in this hospital, or worse yet, in this room. They all look so helpless, like this room scares them but they can't leave. Perhaps they decided against heaven or hell and decided to spend the afterlife in the never ending nightmare of purgatory.

Despite their looks of despair, they somehow wore concerned expressions beneath their ghastly appearance. Like they were sorry? But why? When the masked nurse left the room and turned the corner, right outside the doorframe was a very familiar room. But I'm in the hospital. His back was turned, walking to the chair set up underneath the ceiling fan.

No. Not this again. Please.

The man caressed the braided rope hanging from the fan being so gentle, like one touch could ruin his chances of 'the end.' Despite my  yelling, Usnavi either doesn't hear me or doesn't care. I frantically tried to get up but it seemed the souls were holding me down. "Let me go! I need to stop him!" I panicked.

They say nothing and look over. On the walls of the bedroom, the note I found rubber banded to his wrist was starting to multiply. Those same words that had haunted me since earlier today were all I could see now.

The figure slid his head into the loop and glanced at me slightly. It was the same sight I had seen in my dream at the hospital. But something was different, I was self aware. He looked at me and smiled, "I'm sorry." He said. He took one step off the chair set up at the foot of the bed.

Snap.