e l e v e n

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When night falls, I'm still leaning on dad. The others are inside the house, probably eating dinner. While my dad is getting a fire going, I take off my flannel and lay down on the grass by the fire, using it as a pillow. Not my smartest idea I know but, I have no appetite and I just want to sleep so I don't care if I'm all itchy later. Well until later comes at least.

After a while, Carol comes over telling us that no one can find Lori and the other's who went to find Hershel still haven't returned. That's odd considering they left sometime around noon.

"Yeah?" Dad says not looking up from the fire. "That dumb bitch must've gone off looking for 'em"

"What?" Carol asks confused.

"Yeah, she asked me to go." He says before adding on "I told her I was done being an errand boy." A bit harsh don't you think dad?

"And you didn't say anything?" Carol says with a motherly voice as if scolding a child. Dad stays quite and I notice him biting the inside of his lip.Carol sighs heavily before turning around and starting to walk back to the house only to turn back and walk our direction. "Don't do this, please. I've already lost my girl."

"That wasn't my problem neither." Dad says dropping the stick he had for the fire to the side and storming off.

"I'm sorry." I mutter to Carol. "He get's like this sometimes, and it's hard to get through to him."

When she walks back to the house I go with her. If theres one thing I know about Carl, it's that he's going to need a friend right now. My assumption is correct because I find him walking back to the house as Shane speeds out of the farm to look for his mom.

"I'm sorry Carl, I thought she was back." I tell him as he tries to wipe the tears from his face. "I guess it's my fault, I should've told my dad to go with her, or maybe I could've gone with her."

"Don't blame yourself Cheri, there was nothing you could do." He says sadly. I'm not good at this whole comforting thing whatsoever. All three of his parent figures are gone though so I guess I'll have to do. "Besides she wouldn't let a twelve year old go with her. It's too dangerous."

'Then why would she go alone?' I want to say, but I know it won't help the situation he's in whatsoever. We find ourselves sitting on the front porch of the house. The farm is eerie at night, but tonight especially since we don't know if everyone will return.

"Do you ever wonder what it would be like if ya know, the world hadn't ended?" He asks curiously, probably to get his mind off of things.

"Not really no," I shrug. "My life would still be the same if it had kept functioning. The only difference is that Will would still be alive."

"Who was Will?" Carl asks.

"No one," I whisper getting teary eyed before speaking up a little. "Look forget I said anything about him okay? He was an ass and he doesn't matter."

I stand up and brush off my butt with my hands, closing my eyes and counting to three to try and stop the tears. Since when do I cry so much? 'Since the world ended dumbass.' I walk off towards dad's camp. I hear my dad yelling at a figure that by the petite size I can assume is Carol.

"You ain't my problem!" He yells pointing an angry finger. "Sophia wasn't mine! All you had to was keep an eye on her!" I watch as he takes a step towards her and she flinches, not a lot but noticeably. They stand in awkward silence and I can't help but let the tears I tried so hard to keep in fall down my cheeks.

"Dad!" I yell causing him to turn towards me. I have tears running down my face and I'm in shock. How could he say those things to her? She just lost her only child. Her only good thing left in this world, and he just threw it in her face. "That's enough!" Carol takes one last look at Dad, as if waiting for him to spew more hurtful things at her before walking away. "That's enough." I whisper once more.

"You weren't supposed to see that." He says softly, ashamed of himself.

"Yeah, but I did." I sigh. "What if I was in the barn Daddy? What if I died and she threw it in your face?" He stays silent and starts to bite his thumb. It's a nervous tick, and I know this because I've watched him multiple times do this in front of Will, or a cop when Merle would get in trouble.

I scoff before walking away and towards the house leaving my father to think. I see that the car Shane took is back and Lori's figure is in the house. I find Carl leaving the house with a grin on his face. He looks up and sees me, his grin becoming bigger before he runs over.

"I'm gonna be a big brother!" He states excitedly. He must see the confusion in my eyes because he then says,"My mom, she's pregnant."

"Huh." I dumbly state. The look on his face is adorable though. He looks like a puppy receiving a brand new toy.

"Big brother Carl." He proudly states.

"It does have a nice ring to it." I say giggling.

"Carl! Time to come in for the night bud." Lori calls.

"Okay mom!" He yells back before looking at me. "See you tomorrow Cheri." I nod softly giving him a wave before looking over to my camp. Seeing my dad sitting by our fire alone, I decide I should head back. As quite as I have made my steps, dad hears me anyways.

"C'mere." He calls patting the spot next to him. I trudge slowly over to him and sit down leaning my head on his shoulder. "When'd you grow up on me kid?"

"Who knows daddy." I mutter.

"I thought 'bout what you said," he starts. "And I know I was in the wrong. But I couldn't help myself in that moment, you know that don't you?"

"I know daddy, but you need to apologize to Carol." I see grabbing his hand.

"I will, go get some rest 'kay?" He tells me patting my back.

I nod and head over to our tent, giving the road one last look to check for Rick and the others only to see nothing but darkness. Unzipping my sleeping bag I lay down making sure I have my knife and crossbow nearby, and with that I slip off into a dreamless sleep.

~~~
Word Count: 1153

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