"He was bad. He smoked, he broke the law, he drove too fast for his own good. He didn't care because no one taught him how to. But when it came to her, he wanted to be the best man. He couldn't bare the thought of her being hurt by him.... or by any...
"Sometimes the pain gets too much that all I can do is stare at myself in the mirror, the salty tears falling down my cheeks, watching myself break before my own eyes."
So I haven't been very happy lately with a lot of things, I've just been crying because I can't handle it anymore. So that quote I just wrote has my emotions all in it.
Enjoy this chapter.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"Now, the big questions are... What is love and what is pain? What is right and what is wrong? When do you know that it is no longer love, but a crumbling mess of tears and broken hearts?" The lady stares at me, waiting for me to answer the questions that I can't seem to answer. "Well, Willow?" She urges for me to answer, I blink and look out at the gloomy sky.
"The first question, what is love and what is pain? Well, love is doing anything in your will to make the other person happy. Love is waiting for the phone call and calling first, love is a fire burning deep within you that never really seems to burn out. Pain is waiting for that phone call you're never going to get, pain is sitting on the bathroom floor covering your hand over your mouth so no one hears you crying. Pain is eventually turning numb." The therapist nods, apparently I need therapy because I haven't been acting well lately.
"Good explanation! Now, what is right and what is wrong?" She asks waiting for my response.
"Right is leaving them behind if they no longer bring you happiness. Wrong is staying and letting them hurt you," she nods writing down things on a notebook.
"And the last one? When do you know that it is no longer love?" I think deeply about this one. "Cmon you can do it," she smiles.
"When all they do is bring you pain, when they don't ask what you want they just think about what they want. When nothing about them makes you happy anymore," I whisper, she points her finger at me and starts clicking her fingers.
"See? You know all of this. So why haven't you left him? If you aren't happy then you need to be brave and walk away. And if that flame is gone then you need to tell him," if only she knew that it's more complicated than that.
Sighing, I mutter, "if I had a choice I would leave. I wouldn't look back, I'd just keep walking. But he has this... obsession with me, and he can't let me go. It's an unhealthy obsession but he has it alright, he would never let me be free." She furrows her eyebrows and writes something down before leaning back in her seat.
"Then is it really love or just an obsession? When you love someone, you build up the courage... to eventually let them go and be happy. Love is thinking about their feelings before yours, he can't keep you there forever. One day he will come to the terms that you need to make your own decisions, and he will want you to love him without him forcing you. He will want you to love him because you just do, he wants that." I nod in understanding with where she's going, but still he won't let me go.
