Someone Like You

Chapter Forty-five

I raise my phone with turned on flash as I stand on the pathway starring at a guy who seems to be sleeping on the wooden bench. His arms are below his head, making a pillow. He is lying on his side while his body is curled into a position that could make him feel a little warm. He is lying in a cold open space in the middle of the night like a homeless person along the street.

A pile of trashes are below the bench: bottles of water, cans of soda, wrappers of junk foods, fast food take outs, and boxes of pizza. It's already ten in the evening and yet he is here.

My heart aches at the sight of him.

I was praying that I don't see him still waiting for me. I was hoping that he is somewhere else, but he is still here enduring the freezing coldness and blinding darkness.

I decided to not to come here. I was certain I am not coming here but here I am, watching this man in such a pitiful situation. I was already in my bed, ready to go to sleep when I rush out of my room and sneaked out of the house just to be here.

No matter how hard I convince myself not to go here, I just could not help it. I tried to busy myself with something but it doesn't help me in any way. For the last few days, I could just find myself starring out of the blue wondering about the man, who sent me those beautiful blue roses three days ago.

I slowly walk towards him with heavy breathing. Unknowingly, my tears fall down from my eyes. I cover my mouth with my hand to stop myself from sobbing.

He slowly opens his eyes and raises his head. He slightly covers his eyes with his hand from the flash of my phone. "Who's that?" He utters in a tired voice. I stay silent, unable to properly think of what to say. I remain stun, unable to move even a single muscle. "Melissa." He whispers softly almost not believing himself. "Melissa." He bursts out wishfully.

In an instant, he stands up, runs to me and immediately captures me in a big tight hug. I could hear him breathing hard. I could hear his heart racing. I could hear him sob.

"You're here." He says in shaking voice and embraces me tighter. "You're really here." He utters in a voice that's convincing himself.

"I am." I whisper and hug him back. My emotion finally explodes and I burst into tears. "How long have you been here?" I say after a while, still hugging him.

"I've been here for three days already."

I pull away and look at him with my mouth hanging open. "You've been here for three days?!" I exclaim. "Are you crazy?! Alexander, why would you do that?" I burst out crying a lot more.

"That's a really long time. " He cocks his head to the side and stares at me. "It's all worth it though." He says with a pleased smile. He pulls me again into a hug. "I knew you'd come."

"Really? You're reaction tells me so." I answer sarcastically.

He pauses for a while before he answers. "No. I just wanted to sound cool." He chuckles. Damn, I miss his laugh. "I really thought you won't come. I'm really surprised that you're here."

"Then why are you still waiting?" I utter punching his chest.

"Because I told you that I'll wait." He answers simply. "I have not written any time in the card. I just said that I'll be waiting here. That just means that I'll wait here for you even if it is until forever."

I pull away and punch his chest a lot harder this time. "You're a big idiot! What if something bad happened to you here? What if some wild animal attacked you? What if I didn't come? What if I decided to let you rot here forever? What if –"

He silences my long litany with a deep kiss full of longing and love. "I'm fine and you're here. So please stop crying, okay?" He says after pulling away. He leads me into the bench letting me sit first before he does.

"You had quite a picnic here." I say calmly eyeing the pile of trashes below the bench. "You should have bought a tent."

"I was planning to."

"Seriously?!" I ask looking at him with big eyes. He nods and smiles shyly. "What would happen to you if I did not come?"

He shrugs. "I don't know. I would probably wait for you until the day that I get tired of waiting, which I think would take years." He takes my hand and kisses the back of it. I look at his eyes deeply as they shine under the moonlight. "Why did you come?" He whispers.

"I don't know." I was already lying on my bed when I jumped out of it and sneak out of my house. I could not understand myself either – why I came here? What am I doing here? I don't know the answer to those questions. It's funny how I rushed on going here while wishing on not seeing him. I was uttering a silent prayer, hoping that I would not see Alexander on the cliff waiting for me.

"No. We both know why. It's because you love me, am I right?"

I look away and sigh. I love him – that explains everything. My heart aches as I thought about it. I could not think of anything to answer. Instead, my tears come pouring down again.

He reaches for my chin and gently makes me face him. "It's already clear that you love me too, Melissa. I could see it in your eyes every time you look at me. You love me." He whispers the last word in shaking voice. "Why don't you acknowledge that?"

"Because when I do, it would just complicate everything, I would hurt someone, and I don't want that."

"Then are you here?" He asks firmly, raising his voice that makes me flinch.

He is right. I know the answer – we both know it, but I could not voice it out. I could not find the will to say it out loud and to finally give in to the feelings that I've been running away from. I could not say it thinking that guilt would eat me up alive if I do. I am scared that if I say I love him, I might break all the strings that keep me away from doing the wrong thing.

My eyes blur as tears keep rushing down my cheeks. I could not say a word and crying is just my way of voicing out my feelings.

"Whoever you choose, you would definitely end up hurting someone, so why don't you choose the one who could make you genuinely happy?"

"Why are you doing this to me?" I cry.

"Because as long as I could see in your eyes that you love me, I would never stop pushing myself to you. As long as you have feelings for me, I would never get tired of showing you who do you really love."

He pulls me and hugs me again. We stay like that for so long until I finally calm down. His arms are wrapped around my shoulders as I lean my head on his muscular chest.

I don't know what tomorrow holds. I don't know what would happen on the future, but for now, I feel good being with him like this. I might regret what I am doing but my heart is overflowing with emotions right now. I don't know what would be the consequences for these things but I will gladly face all of them.

I close my eyes and lean my head more to his chest. "Alexander, I love you." I whisper.

I hear him smile. "I love you too." He answers and kisses my head.