Anonymous Journal - Lucy

March 14th, 2014

I realized something today. Something that shook me up and scared me and made me hurt. 

I don't have a friend in the world.

I have my girlfriend, but I worry about worrying her, so I don't tell her my problems.

All my other friends have grown far away from me, and it would be like calling a stranger.

All my pets, my second choice of thing to talk to, are gone.

As I reflected on this, I took a blade to my stomach, and just like that, an old habit came back. The scars are still bleeding as I type this. I'm not sorry I did it. I don't regret it. I just wish I didn't have to do this anymore.

I'm alone in the universe, and I can't fix it. I am killing myself slowly and there's nothing I can do to prevent it.

I don't want to live, but I'll carry on.

I don't want to be here. I don't. I hurt here. My body is crumbling. I am a terrible person.

I don't want to be here.

I want to escape and run and just LEAVE.

I hate myself. I hate myself and I want to die.

I hate myself and i want to die

i hate myself and i want to die.

i hate myself and i want to die

i hate myself and i want to die.

i hate myself and i want to die.

I think what i'm trying to say is, help me. please.

lucyintheskywithlennonxx@gmail.com

please