I Wait~ Wonpil Day6

#9

When I got outside my office and closed the door, I wanted to cry again. I had to hold in my tears. But I felt one tear falling down my cheek. Why was I constantly sad?
It wasn't because of Jun's behavior against me. I was used to it, and didn't mind it. But ever since earlier this day in the elevator, I was on edge.
And now, it wasn't only the fact that Wonpil yelled at me, but the feeling of that this may be my last day here. I was sure I would get fired. For something. I had already made so many mistakes and even broken a few rules since I started working here.
- lets get you somewhere else than in the middle of the hallway.
Someone said. Or not just "someone". By now I could recognize his voice everywhere. Did he follow me? Or was this time actually a coincidence? My thoughts where interrupted by him taking my hand.
- don't freak out, I won't take you to the elevator, let's go.
He said when I turned to look at him. He dragged my arm until we got to an empty room. What was he planning?
- what do you do intend to ruin now?
I asked him.
being alone with him kind of made me forget that I had to treat him with respect and be afraid of him. At least right now.
- I followed you because I wanted to.. be with you.
He told me.
Wait what? He wanted to kiss me again?
Maybe I wanted him to.
- why?
I asked him. Just to stall the time. Because I wasn't sure if it was a joke or not. But I really hoped it wasn't. Because him kissing me, for some weird reason, made me stop thinking.
- I don't know to be honest.
He said, and pushed me up against the wall. Wow.
- ok..
I told him.
I kind of surprised myself. I had boyfriends in the past. So it wasn't like it he was my first kiss. But I was just as exited like a first kiss. Because in high school, all I wanted was for him to be my first everything..
the boy who made me so interested that I constantly bullied him.
- are you sure? This can't be more than this..
he said.
I already knew that. I knew we would never date. Never get in a relationship.
- yes.
I told him. He tasted sweet. Like chewing gum. Cherry flavored.
And we just kept going on. It became deeper. And at some point he lifted me up and placed me on one of the tables.
If Mr.Kim, our PE teacher could see him now..
I wanted to laugh.
I didn't even know what kind of room this was. I didn't care. All I cared about, was that he wouldn't stop. I could do this forever. Some part of me though, wished that this was real love, because that was what I felt. Butterflies in my stomach. And in general the way he made me feel. How could this person hate me? He couldn't when he kissed me like this.
I had feelings again. For the boy from high school. They had always been there.

Why did it happen again so fast? Maybe I never really let go of him. But I knew, that for him, it probably was only a physical attraction. But I didn't really care.
At some point, he started kissing my neck and his hands was rooming all over my body. Then he stopped, to look at me. My face was probably pink from blushing.
- lets... do this again.
He then said. It did surprise me at first. But i agreed. I wanted to do this again too.
- ok.
I told him. I also wanted to tell him I loved him. But I couldn't. It would probably ruin this thing we got going on. And I didn't want that.
- ok.
He just said back.
Eventually we had to leave this random room that I had come to love.

I still had some hours left with the boys. Today was the day I had lessons with the boys the whole day. But at least it gave me tomorrow off. To be honest, earlier this morning it made me a bit sad that I had the day off tomorrow. I really liked being with Day6.
Jun was still here, but I made him leave. After I told him to wait in the cafeteria for me to be done. But he didn't. So Sungjin and Brian drove me home. They where such good friends. But at the same time, they weren't my friends. They couldn't be. It was just how it had to be. WonPil decided to come with us though.

When we got to my place, I really wanted to invite them in. But I waited for them to ask instead. And they did. Well Brian did. I had come to realize that he really liked my roommate Jun.
- you can come inside, Just don't let Mr park know.
I told them. Even WonPil came inside my apartment. To be honest I was a bit worried about that part. Because in this apartment, there was obviously my bedroom. With a bed. And I was still a bit dazed from the time in that random room with him. I really wanted to invite him to my room, and maybe go further than kissing. But I knew it was wrong to feel like that. So I didn't invite him in there. I just let the boys be boys, playing games on our PlayStation. I went into my room only to change my clothes. To the outfit I wore because jun came to the JYP building. Because it was actually really comfortable. And pink was low key my favorite color. I was a girly girl after all.
I got into the living room, and decided to make the boys dinner. They where already busy by the TV. I decided to make bulgogi. I was a good cook to be honest. My mother teached me before my father and brother died.

After I was done with the meal, I told the guys to come to the kitchen. Then I went to my room. I couldn't eat after today. My mind... where busy. With thinking
Inappropriate things about Wonpil.
I couldn't help it.

But I also couldn't stop thinking about getting my ribs smashed with a metal bar.

•WonPil's POV•

When we got to Siyeon's place, I actually got really surprised. It was a really nice apartment. It actually looked like she was rich. It was so high maintenance. And after a while of gaming and talking to her roommate Jun, I actually started liking him. He was really funny and a cool guy. I didn't even really suspect he and Siyeon was in a relationship anymore. I had to admit I did when I first met him. I actually felt jealous at first. But why would I be? Yes we kissed more than once this day. But we could never be anything. I didn't even like her like that. Right?
I did feel something. But I was sure it was because she looked so beautiful. Nothing more.
She was after all my worst nightmare for 3 years.

She even made us dinner. I did notice that she didn't even eat anything herself. She just left. I got curious. So when the rest of the boys where focused on the food, I went into the hallway. I figured her room was the one with the pink heart on the door. I nocked.

After a few seconds, she opened the door. She looked tired. Or something. To be honest it looked like she had cried. Because under her eyes where some dark spots. I suspected it was mascara.
- can I.. come inside?
I asked her. She just nooded and moved away from the doorway, letting me inside.
Her walls was filled with pictures of a boy, and an older male. The rest was was pink. Pink stuffed animals and pillows. And a big bookcase. But it didn't seem like normal books. It looked like diaries.
Siyeon sat on her bed. I had realized by now, that she didn't really look tired. She looked sad.
- are you ok?
I found myself asking. Why? Did I care about her? I couldn't, right?
- no. I mean yes.
She said, and smiled. But it looked so fake. I even felt bad for her. Why? I didn't really know anymore. Why did I keep thinking about her? Why did I start to care about her? She didn't deserve it. I wasn't even sure who I was anymore because of her. She made me feel hate. And pity. But mostly lust.
- can I ask you something personal?
I asked her, and sat carefully on her bed beside her. I guess we could talk freely for a while. I did lock the door behind me.
She shifted on her bed, making sure we didn't touch each other.
- ok.
She said, and looked at me. Her eyes.. pierced through mine. That was what I felt. I looked away from her eyes while asking the question.
- what happened to your brother and father?
I asked her. I know I shouldn't have asked. It would probably hurt her. But I couldn't help it. She got an even sadder look.
- car accident. Drunk driver crashed into them.
She said, her voice breaking a little. Damn why did I have to ask?
- I'm sorry. I guess it changed you?
I said. She looked into my eyes again, and nodded.
- please don't tell the others who I really am. It hurts enough that you remember.
She said.
And I made a decision, no, I couldn't?
- ok. I promise.
I told her.
Why did I say that? I couldn't keep the promise. I knew that I had to tell the rest of the guys and prove to them who she really was.
- kiss me again?
She asked me, really surprising me.
I did want to kiss her again. Just because I still had this lust for her. I told her yes. So we did.
But we even went further. We ended up sleeping together... I really hadn't planned for it to happen. I got dressed and quickly exited her room.

I felt bad for just leaving her in her room. But the two members of my group that was in this apartment, could never find out. I would tell Dowoon about this. But nobody else.
She never came out of her room after it.
When we decided to leave, I really wanted to go inside her room to say goodbye, but I just... couldn't.
Brian went inside her room though, and came out after two minutes. But he didn't look different or look at me weirdly. So she definitely didn't tell him.
But why would she?

I wasn't even sure what to think about what happened even. I just felt myself being more and more attracted to her. But it was only physical right?