More Than He Was Going For (Austin Mahone Love Story)

Chapter Twenty-Three

Austin's P.O.V.

As she drove away, I stood there in complete shock. The slap was expected, and well deserved, but her words cut me like a knife.

"Just let me go. You've had your fun."

I wanted to yell at her, I wanted to scream at her. I wanted her to know and understand that this wasn't apart of my plan. It actually was far from my plan, all I wanted was her. But shit always happens. I cant blame it on anyone except myself, even though I wanted to blame it on everyone else.
The truth was that I didn't want Becky, that she offered herself up and I took it. Why I did? I didn't know. I still don't know. Sure, I guess I just wanted some since I hadn't had it in awhile, but now I regretted it. I should've just waited until Summer was ready again, but I couldn't, and I desperately wish I had.
As I stood there in that parking lot, the sounds of the rushing traffic being my only acquaintance, I decided that I was just going to go home. Forget the plans with Becky, forget everyone else. Forget the arrangement Rocco so desperately wanted to work, I needed to get my life and shit together for this girl. She may not ever take me back, but damn, she's literally all I ever wanted. All I ever needed.
   "Austin?" I heard Becky call from behind me, clearly concerned. But I ignored her, walking to my car and getting inside, before I lost the lyrics in my head. "Austin!!"
   I shut the door and frantically started the ignition, fastening my seat belt and speeding out of the parking lot, leaving Becky to herself. I drove as fast as I could down the road, until the traffic finally backed me up. I gave up and took out my phone, clicking the notes icon and writing down the lyrics that kept repeating themselves in my head.

"You're all I ever need, baby you're amazing. You're my angel come and save me. You're all I ever need, baby you're amazing. You're my angel come and save me."

I had a solid chorus by this point, but what could I begin the song with? What could I connect needing her with?

"Don't the water grow the trees? Don't the moon pull the tide? Don't the stars light the sky, like you need to light my life?"

"Damn," I said quietly. "I think I have another song."

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   When I finally got home, I wrote the entire song in full. I hardly ever had a day where I could write an entire song, but it seems as though Summer brought out the best in me. She really did, she was my entire world and I screwed it up. Who the fuck was I? I could've had her back, I could've been with her right now, but I wasn't because all I wanted in that moment with Becky was sex, as though it clouded my vision.
   Of course, this thought process repeated itself over and over again until I finally decided that I couldn't get her back unless I actually tried. I couldn't keep my distance, even though she wanted me to, I couldn't run away from her. I needed to prove myself.
  Once again, I jumped into my car and sped through the Miami highways and made my way to her house, begging to God for her to be home and to at least listen. However, when I made my way to her house, something seemed off. Her car was in her driveway, yet every light was off in her house. There's no way she was asleep already, it was only 11:00.
   I made my way to her front door, which was locked, of course. I decided to take my usual route up to her bedroom balcony, where the door was always unlocked. When I walked into the bedroom, there was no sound except for the loud music coming from the bathroom. As weird as it was, I knocked on her door. I hoped I wouldn't scare her, but when there was no response or sudden movement, I knew something was wrong.
"Summer?" I called. No answer. "Summer I'm sorry, can you open the door? Just so I can know you're okay?" Again, no answer. She would've told me to shut the hell up and get away already. My heart began to race as I shook the door, trying to get it open. It was definitely locked. I kept pushing, hoping for it to open but it never did. I pushed harder, and harder, until the door busted off the hinges, leading me to the immediate sight of an unconscious Summer, slowly emerging under the water in the tub.
"No, no, no," I said, running to her and snatching up her naked body. "Summer? Summer? Baby, please wake up. Oh no, no. No!"
   I pulled my phone out of my back pocket and immediately dialed 911, reporting the emergency as I tried to get her to a conscious state. Failing continuously, I checked for a pulse, which got weaker each time I checked.
"Summer, don't leave me. Please! Don't leave me, I'm so sorry baby. I'm so sorry."
The ambulance arrived and immediately took her, giving her oxygen and everything else she needed. They questioned me and asked me questions, as I somehow talked my way into riding in the ambulance with her. I told them as much as I knew, as they frantically worked over her body. I held her hand as they tried to perform any sort of CPR they could, trying to find out the source of the problem, before they could do anything else she flatlined.
"Summer, no!" I cried, tears swelling up in my eyes.
"Sir, I'm going to ask that you sit back. We're about to do use an electric shock," the EMS man said, as the others were quickly gathering the equipment. I prayed for her to come back, for her to be here with me, as they tried twice with no response. I cried harder than I ever did, knowing that the only thing I wanted in this world was her by my side.
"Maybe third time's the charm?" One of the men said, as they charged up the electric shocker and pressed down once more. Thankfully, her heart beat finally returned, giving me a sense of hope.
Before we knew it, we were in the hospital and I was running behind the EMS men as they carried her to a room of which I couldn't enter.
"You're going to have to stay here, sir. Right now I suggest calling a few people, because it might be awhile," the man said, shutting the double doors in my face quickly. I ran my fingers through my hair as tears began to stream down my face. I felt as though I couldn't breathe I was crying so hard. Who the hell could I call?
I looked down at my phone and saw my most recent text message, Rocco. I immediately pressed the call button in the upper right hand corner, hoping he'd answer this late at night. To my luck, he did.
"Hello?" He said, his voice cracking, symbolizing that he just woke up.
"Rocco, man, I'm sorry for calling you so late-"
"What's wrong, Austin? Why are you crying?"
"Summer's in the hospital, I need you down here. I need someone, anyone," I said. "You were the first person in my recent messages."
"I'll be down there immediately, man. Thanks for letting me know," he said, before quickly hanging up. I pressed my back against the wall, letting myself slide into the floor. This isn't what I imagined this night to be. I imagined her fighting with me, telling me to go away and to do something with my life while she continued to live hers. But instead, I witnessed her death, and it was because of me. She wouldn't have done this had I never slept with Becky.
   I reached a point where I couldn't cry anymore, I just sat in silence with my head against the wall, thinking about how much I fucked up, and how much I hurt her. I was a terrible person, I was a damn sex addict for crying out loud. I didn't deserve her, but I loved her. I've made mistakes, but sleeping with Becky had to be my biggest, if it hurt her this much. She was so open to giving me a second chance, and she was open to letting me into her her heart again, even though the first time I only had the intentions of sleeping with her.
Thinking about that alone, regret washed over my body, as it had done a million times in this day alone. She was in the operating room right now, barely even unconscious and alive, and it was because I had hurt her. It was my fault.
Rocco, Bei, Stacy, and Becky all came rushing through the doors, catching me in deep thought. I didn't pay attention to any of them at first, but it soon became unavoidable.
"What's going on?" Rocco demanded, walking over to me. I shook my head.
"I don't really know everything, all I know is that she's in the operating room right now. I found her in her tub at her house unconscious," I said quietly. Everyone gasped while Stacy and Becky began to cry, Bei putting a hand on his head and looking up to the ceiling in prayer. Rocco sighed, tears evident in his eyes, barely able to make eye contact with me. Everyone remained silent as we waited for any sort of hope from the doctors. A few moments turned to minutes, then two hours, until finally a doctor emerged from the double doors. His expression looked doubtful.
"Is the mother or father present?" He asked, well all shook our heads.
"No, they aren't," Rocco confirmed. "Her mother lives in Dallas, Texas and is currently on her way right now."
"In that case, I will just tell all of you what we have found and done so far," the doctor continued, trying to be as professional as possible. "It is evident that she overdosed on pain medication and had a severe case of alcohol poisoning, both of which mixed together is not a very good outcome. We have pumped her stomach and have had to revive her twice after once in the ambulance with a total of three times, and now she is currently at a steady heart rate but is in a medically induced coma. At this point, her chances of surviving are half and half, and we have done all that we can do."
All of us looked at each other in complete shock, as we had no idea what to say or do. The only thing we knew was that she had a chance at living, and she had an equal amount of a chance at dying.