Deceptions & Secrets

Chapter 9: Meeting the Monster

Chapter 9: Meeting the Monster

Date: The Night of Tobias Choosing Ceremony (Middle of June)

**Beatrice POV**

My limbs are like dead weight as I go through the motions of completing the day's chores. I knew it would be hard to get it all done alone, without Tobias to help me... but I never guessed that he would leave me so broken, so shattered.

I have avoided this task for too long. It should have been the first thing I did, but I couldn't face it. I continue to avoid the inevitable, gathering first the laundry from the bathroom, then Mother and Marcus's room, then mine. Finally, I reach the closed door to the room Tobias occupied for the past four months. I place my hand on the doorknob and simply let it rest there, leaning my forehead against the solid wood of the door, slowly breathing in and out. After this I don't have to gather his dirty clothes ever again, I remind myself. Today should be the last day that I must enter this room. Tobias and I never stayed here in this room together, it was always in my own bed, but this was still where he slept. It holds too many memories... first, all the memories of my brother, and now, memories of the boy I was foolish enough to give my heart to. A boy who was only using me. I acted like just a silly little girl. I have endured so much heartbreak these past months, and yet I invited him in, to put me through more.

I weigh too much, more than my small frame can support, so much I should fall right through the floor.

Finally, I take one last deep breath in through my nose and slowly push all the air out through my mouth, until my lungs scream for air, ridding myself as much as possible of the sorrow that is overwhelming me. I stand straight before I open the door and push my way through.

The room looks as it always has since Tobias has lived here, except for something blue and translucent on the desk. Sunlight streams through the open curtains of the bedroom window, through the blue glass, casting a sullen glow on the white wall behind it, matching my mood. I step forward to see the object up close; it is a statue which looks like falling water, smooth and polished. We shouldn't have such things in Abnegation, things which do not serve to help anyone, and for a moment, I wonder where he got it. I thought I knew so much about Tobias, but I knew nothing.

People, I have discovered, are layers and layers of secrets. You believe you know them, that you understand them, but their motives are always hidden from you, buried in their own hearts.

I never really knew Tobias Eaton. Not at all. I never could have imagined I could so grossly misjudge him. I suppose this statue... wherever he got it, for whatever reason it sits here now... is just another of his secrets. I always thought he was so well-suited for Abnegation. I was wrong.

I jump when, for the first time in my life, I hear our front door slam so hard things around me vibrate, making rattling noises. Heavy footsteps which can only belong to Marcus grow louder as he makes his way up the stairs, grumbling unintelligibly. I turn away from the statue, hurrying out of the room.

I've stopped a few steps into the hallway, about to turn back-- in my haste, I forgot to pick up the dirty clothes I went into Tobias's room for-- when Marcus reaches the top of the stairs. The air around me abruptly feels as though all the warmth has been sucked out of it, replaced with a malevolence that seeps from Marcus's entire being. The hair on the back of my neck stands on end and my shoulders tense as I nod at him, my eyes not meeting his, looking anywhere but at his face.

I turn back toward Tobias's room to retrieve the laundry. Marcus bellows, "Beatrice!" I stop mid-step, slowly turning on the balls of my feet. Marcus glares at me, and despite knowing what this man, this monster, is capable of, the rage contained in his eyes almost makes me take a step back. "Do not waste my soap on that rotten little bastard's clothing. He won't be coming back for them. And I forbid you to ever step foot in that room again."