Surviving Cancer

Friday, December 29

LEVI POV

I made my way to Maci's room. My parents were both still at home. Each day that passed I felt more and more like myself. I was regaining my energy which I was thankful for. I couldn't even imagine how Maci felt. I knew it had to suck to be stuck in a hospital room, especially with no energy. I swung my keys on my finger, giving one of the nurses a head nod and a half smile. By now they all knew us by name, I was still struggling to learn theirs so I just refrained from saying names altogether. Nothing worse than calling someone the wrong name. I knocked on the door, turning the nob and slowly entering just in case she was changing.

"Hey, it's me." I said, helping the door shut behind me.

I didn't get a response. It was a 50/50 shot she would be awake. She wasn't. I quietly dropped my keys on the tray beside her bed, settling into a chair. I yanked the beanie of my head, discarding it with my jacket on another chair nearby. I unlocked my phone pulling up Emma's text conversation.

Me: just got to Maci. Text you when I'm leaving. Probably a couple hours.

I tossed my phone, watching it land on my coat and slide a little. I tilted my head back, staring at the panes in the ceiling. Maci still hadn't said why she had barely talked to me over Christmas. My mom however had clued me in. I wasn't sure what to say on the matter so I also hadn't said anything. We were at a stalemate and it was getting more and more awkward as it went. Which was why I had decided today I was going to bring it up.

"Hey." Maci's voice was gravely and low.

"Sorry did I wake you?" I asked, bringing my eyes to hers.

She shook her head no. "How long have you been here?"

"Just came in."

I looked away and so did Maci, the tension falling through the air like a stack of bricks. There was no denying it.  I felt that squeeze of anxiety that comes when you're nervous and knew that if I didn't just say it, it'd never get said it. It was probably going to come out with no finesse but whatever.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." I blurted.

I kept my eyes trained on the floor, I couldn't even see her in my peripheral vision.

"I kind of didn't know how and then I thought maybe it'd just be better if I just kept it to myself." I explained. I ran my hand over my head. "If I hadn't gone snooping through dad's stuff we never would have found out anyway."

My heart was trying to pound harder but I kept telling it to get a grip. It was Maci. My sister. My best friend. She'd come around.

"Why would you think I wouldn't want to know?" She asked, her voice had a chill to it.

She was still pissed.

"I didn't." I admitted.

When I found that folder I had wished and prayed that it had been a dream. That I'd open it back up and it would just be some unimportant document kept all these years. But no matter how many times I closed the folder and reopened it the documents stayed the same.

"Well I'm not you." Maci snapped.

I let out a sigh, forcing myself to look up at her. I had to at some point. Even if she looked at me with anger in her eyes.

"Do you want to meet him too?" I asked.

I was trying to stay impassive about the whole thing. Eric Summers was nothing to me. Just a name I'd force myself to forget over the years. I didn't hate him. I didn't like him. I wasn't curious. He just didn't exist.