soon.

lxii.

̶ ̶ lxii. JEALOUS, LOOKING AT WHAT I SHOULD HAVE BEEN.

i foam at the mouth with jealousy and hatred more than i should when i see you conquering mountains with a back bone full of heart wrenching war zones and blood filled trenches. you make me feel so small and insignificant in a world full of billions that shout out your name in admiration instead of mine. you're the summer breeze while i'm winter nights and i want to be like you someday but i'm too frostbitten over to be able to melt into strangers hands the way you have. you have reached for the inevitable and you keep your secrets to yourself so i don't ask how, i ask why.

why did you take everything i built up to be away from me?
why are you so selfish?
why did you leave me with nothing after i gave you my everything?

you wished me the best of luck with my future in your hands and i could feel your nails dig half moons into your palms as you crushed everything i had into nothing more than small pieces that were beyond repair.

you wear my smile better than i could anyways.