Beyond Her Fear

Chapter - 23

Aileen's POV

Blue

Everything seems so blue, like a clear bright sky. The nature around me was so pure. I wanted to find something different from blue but couldn't. I was free, finally in peace. The peace which provides intense Harmony to one's soul. I was lost in the never-ending blue surrounding yearning to find a home, which I was dying to live for so long. I was dancing with blue and followed by its lead.

I saw upwards and the bright light hit my eyes, leaving a message of realisation.

I was drowning.

The blue which was once a source of peace for me now became a source of irritation. Beneath me, the black large whole was trying to drag me​ into its core. No matter how much I tried to move upwards, the more I was going down; into darkness. The darkness which always haunted me. The more I wanted to run away, the more it followed me.

I couldn't breathe.

I couldn't stay strong much.

I wanted to yell, but couldn't.

I was suffocating.

Ya Allah!

Why I am so weak?

Why you made women so helpless?

I know I wouldn't die with this ease. I was made to struggle. I was made to tolerate all the misery, difficulties. Death became my guest, it came and went, but never stayed. Not only death even happiness had the same nature. Death was my regular guest, it came and throw all the gifts it has on my heart like pain, misery, tears, sorrow, horror, scars; and went away.

Just went away!

I wanted it to stay but it never. Death is really merciless and a bad guest.

I was going down and down, towards the black large whole.

Suddenly, I don't know from where a hand came, grabbed​ me by my elbow and pulled me outside.

The bright light hit my eyes. I couldn't able to open my eyes properly. All I saw is a figure standing in front of me and told me a single word.

"LIVE"

He was Umar.

His beautiful green eyes and the brightest smile was always there. He is handsome. I have most of the traits from him. He always saves me from troubles. No matter how big the problem I am in, he always gets me out from it.

When I scrubbed my eyes and open it, I saw my room's ceiling decorated with beautiful designs as if trying to give a message, a secret message of no one was aware of. Beside me, Shazman was there deep into his own dreams.

I wish I also had dreams instead of nightmares. I think these nightmares became a part of my life if they would not come I started feeling something missing. Not those misery, fear or pain but lost the existence of 'Umar'. I could bear anything just to see Umar, no matter whether in nightmares or in reality.

I love him a lot.

They say the thing you love the most will never be yours. But no! Umar is a part of me, my twin. He is residing in me, forever and ever. He is alive in every breeze of wind and in every drop of rain.

I can feel him.

The only sound which was trying to dominate its existence in the eerie silence of the room was the tick-tock of clock trying to tell me it was the time of Tahajjud prayer.

I read Tahajjud and asked Allah- the all Knower about everything I want because I know nothing is difficult for Him.

Constant occurrence of Umar in my dreams is a sacred message I thought might be he would come soon. I could never stop hoping for his return.

I don't know why and from where I got married to Shazman. He is so nice and generous but the question which always irritated me was that 'Do I really deserve him?'

I was the broken one.

Every time I saw him, I get lost into his charm. His chestnut eyes were so hypnotising, his black raven hairs were so soft and the essence from him smells so spiritual. And the most beautiful thing I found was his attitude.

God! He is so perfect. Ma Shaa Allah!

I was there on my prayer mat when the windows started shuttering in haste indicating there was a snowstorm outside. But how ironic was that I also had a storm inside me resulting in the inconsistent beating of my heartbeat, but the only difference between the outside storm and the storm which was residing inside me was its 'visibility'.

I stood up and reached towards the window to clam it down. There I saw a crumpled paper. I didn't know from where it came. I bent down to open it and the very words on it were enough to make me freeze on the spot. Snowstorm now seemed less dangerous than the paper which I was holding in my hands. The handwriting was enough to recall all 'those' memories, which I never wanted to remember. But again nothing goes according to my will, ever!

Every letter on the paper had its thousands of meanings. It read so small but enough to turn my world upside down. The words that made my every part of body shiver.

' I am here. I hope we will meet soon, Aile!'

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Assalamualaikum and Hello Friends.
Its been a long gap of update. My sessionals are going to start so soon and I want to make it well. As this story is not already written so I tried my hard to do an update for my dear readers. I also missed Aileen and Shazman too.

So here are some questions for you.

1. What do you think about Aileen?

2. A dead letter, what you guys think? who sent that to her?

3. And how was the chapter overall?

So anxious to read your answers. 😊

Have fun!

And yeah don't forget to give a star 🌟, that really means a lot to me. :)

Keep shining! 🌟