Sotus After Story

Chapter-30 Kongpob

Tee was idly lying on the middle of my bed, engrossing himself in watching television. He was drinking the same drink which Arthit prefers "Pink Milk".
He kept the plastic glass swiftly on the cupboard next to my bed not looking at me. His keen concentration was on television. He uttered something, spontaneously laughing like he would explode any moment. Tee surprises me with his unique nature, always full of glee. But recently I've noticed something eccentric. He's my friend since we were in elementary, not that close from the very beginning though. He became my best friend in high school, & before university entrance he left for United States . He belonged from a really wealthy family. I was amazed when I learnt that M informed him about me, I never knew they were that close. I was the one to introduce him to M last year when he visited Bangkok in winter. He knew him for a year or so, but he informed M about his arrival. Even more skeptic was the way he was treating me, especially when Arthit was around. Firstly, I assumed him to care about me because I was a bit washed out. My assumption was proven wrong when I compared his behavior when Arthit wasn't around. He wouldn't even have let me simply rest on my own bed. His act was certainly suspicious. He showered me with his benevolent act one moment and the next moment he was the same nonchalant person he used to be. Obviously, this Tee was much more recognizable than the one who pretends in front of Arthit.
I slouched on the spare space on my bed next to him, while trying to focus on the tv show he was gravely addicted in. The chips he had earlier had left some crumbs on the bed. This guy was gradually making me drat. I cleaned that with my own hand, "When will you leave?" I hurled at him.
"You want me to leave?" he replied.
"Yeah, I do."
"But I just came last night Kong!" He argued.
"So what? Don't you need to leave for your own home?"
"No, this time I want to stay here. It feels much comfy to me."
"But not to me!" I grinned.
"I know you secretly want me to stay here, but feel shy to express. Am I right?" he joked.
" Wrong," I replied.
This guy was surely getting to my nerves. Normally, I wouldn't have mind him to stay as long as he would have want. But not this time, it felt wrong, perhaps Arthit was getting a wrong perception of our friendship. He gets easily jealous, that troubles me the most. Anyway he doesn't care whether I feel jealous or not, then why should I care even if he is envious.
He cooked the breakfast today, even he took me at his place on that terrible night. He tried to show much of his usual affection, "Why is he showing affection to me if he's dating someone else?"I gave a logical thought. He's surely not someone who would cheat, the person I knew more than me is a more candid person. He's a bit amateur when it's regarding his parents, anyone should have. My case is different as I don't share a common relationship with my parents. But I certainly realize his terms.
There's arguably something I'm missing out amidst of our fight.
It's hard not to think of him even if I decide to. He's been a major part of my life in my every day schedule. "How could I stop myself thinking about someone I've craved so hard to get?" I questioned myself . My conscience was against all of my decision. Thinking about the possibility of setting everything right back to before was whirling in my mind. But I constantly reminded myself not to be the first as usual. If he approach first then the matter can be considered depending upon the fact that caused the situation. I feared myself melting down way too quick, but considering the phase I was stuck in, it worth it at least to me. I was literally struggling in despair.
*****
Past few days were terribly awful. I hate being at home for too long, it's more like suffocating without fresh air. I slowly put on my sweat pant and a jacket prior to my escape from my own home. I didn't want Tee to notice me leaving. I wanted to avoid his company at any cost. If he had known I was going for a walk he could have demanded to join me in. My phone was almost battery dead but when I realised it was already too late. I was out & I couldn't possibly fetch my power bank without reaching Tee's territory. I jinxed M for informing him. He should have at-least told me before inviting him on my behalf.
I walked slowly on the pavement, winter air directly hitting my bare face. My cheeks went numb with cold. I rubbed both of my palm against each other looking for some warmth but couldn't get any. I didn't know where I was going, I wanted to meet S only if I was sure that he was at his place. Nowadays he's difficult to reach. I put my cold hands into the pocket of my jacket & took fast steps to get to my usual comfort zone, my favorite cafe. It wasn't much far from where I stood. If I keep on with this pace I'll get there within ten minutes or so.
The skinny receptionist was in her warmest clothing that day, she was covered with several layers of clothing despite of the heater actively warming the atmosphere inside the cafe. She was well familiar with me, I was sort of  their regular customer. She frequently saw me & Arthit coming there together. She used to keenly notice us, I found it a bit eccentric but never paid attention. It was common when you're close with a guy, people might do it on purpose to make you feel sick. It never really bothered me at any extreme extent.
I ordered my usual cup of latte with two brownies & also a hot chocolate.
I dipped my brownie in the hot chocolate before placing it into my mouth. It may look weird but I liked it that way even if that was unusual. Arthit used to say that the hot chocolate takes its flavor away if I do so but I never heed to him. I took another large portion of my brownie, when he got inside. I couldn't believe he's presence, he normally didn't like this cafe. He never came here if I hadn't insisted him to.
He was wearing a striped shirt with his office card hanging loosely by his neck. He looked like any average men attending office of his age.
He possibly didn't saw me being present there, so I covered my face with the menu book.
I sighed with relief when I heard a swish sound of the door being closed. I kept the menu book aside assuming he was gone. I nibbled the last piece of my brownie which almost got stuck when I saw him firmly standing right in front of me. I felt a huge lump in my throat. I certainly couldn't ignore his gaze at my direction. I avoided looking promptly into his eyes to make it clear as hell that I was kind of  ignoring him.
He ushered closer & took a seat opposite to me. His eyes bright with delight as if he discovered some sort of jewel. I had to behave cool & mostly calm. He moved his right hand towards me, almost reaching for my hand, which he didn't. He grabbed the spare spoon and took delicately a portion from my dessert. I instantly stared at his direction to protest, " P! Why don't you order your own?"
"Why should I waste my money when my boyfriend can share some with me?" he grinned.
I remained mute. If I had tried to start any conversation then matter would have dragged to an argument.
"Kongpob," he hesitated.
"P! I'm not in the mood." I protested.
"You don't have to be in the mood. You just need to listen for once."
I could have left right away without giving him a chance but I wanted to know. I wanted to know everything that created a barrier between us for so long. I wanted to know the issue that kept us apart for the past few days that never happened before. Something inside me was eager to explore the truth. One thing was certain, P'Arthit won't lie. He might not want me anymore, he may even kept secrets but lying was not in his genes.
*****
The girl was still staring at us suspiciously when we both intended to leave. Her eyes were still focused on us in an oblivious way. When P'Arthit pushed the door to open she was innocently smiling at us by now, "Thank you, Sir! Have a good day!" She bowed.

Sluggishly I walked on the pavement & P'Arthit followed me behind. The extraordinarily cool winter giving a chill to my nerves.
"Kongpob, it was my mother who wanted me to meet that girl."
"You're mother wanted you to kiss her as well?" I retorted.
" She forcefully kissed me! Didn't you notice that?" He shrieked.
" What about the party?"
"That was the last time with her! If I hadn't bring her there my mom threatened me to come over!"
"Seriously?" I groaned.
"Yeah, I wanted to avoid my mom at any cost & it was as simple as that."
He cleared it that simply. I cursed myself under my breath, "Why would I have to make it that complex?"
Obviously, I couldn't accept my fault at once, so I avoided his gaze.
"Why didn't you mention that earlier to me?" I muttered feeling a little bit guilty inside.
"I didn't want you to get worried unnecessarily."
"Unnecessarily? Don't you think if you dared to let me know it before then the matter wouldn't have become this complex?" I hollered.
He tilted his head. I wanted to scream out really loud to him. I wanted to scold him for all the trouble he caused me, for hiding these little issues from me but I wish I could. He was feeling as much guilty as I was feeling at that moment. His expression was vividly yelling out that loud. An instinct of sorry rapidly encroached in my heart.