Please stay

Paul

I woke up and a few days later I am allowed to go home. Till helped me get home. I have no idea where Richard is. I am supposed to take it easy for awhile. I laid on the couch and go to bed.

I hear movement next to me but don't move and I don't open my eyes. I feel the warmth of a blanket. Then I feel someone touching my head. Then I get kissed.

"I love you Paul. Please stay. Please stop hurting yourself. I can't take it anymore."

I then feel him picking me up and laid me in bed. I hurt him. He must have seen the cuts I caused on my arms and everything. I could hear the sadness and hurt in Richard's voice. He was gentle when he picked me up and laid me on the bed.

I had no idea he was still here. He was crying and he laid next to me and cried himself to sleep. I wasn't rejected. But how do I change. How do I not be this depressed person.

I feel so bad for all the sadness I caused him. I was blind not to see. I made sure he is asleep and I go get a shower and make myself something to eat. I also get rid of anything bad in my house. I decided to make a stand. I am going to fight this.

I go to my office and start playing. I let the music take over and help me. For once I feel better. I then go back to bed. Tomorrow is a whole new day.