And I Love Her (Paul McCartney/Beatles fanfiction)

Hurt

"What have I become, my sweetest friend? Everyone I know goes away in the end." ~Hurt - Johnny Cash/NIN   

Trigger Warning: Drug abuse

Dear Charli,

Life has been absolutely manic in the last 2 years! It's been too long since I've heard from you, I hope someday you see these letters and know I never stopped caring for you.

John's little one is more adorable every day. I wish you could see him!

I think Johnny is still a bit baffled he's a father.

I wish you could see the insanity that follows us! We can't go anywhere now without being recognised.

I know I've talked about it non-stop and you're probably sick of hearing about the band, but...we may be coming to the US next year! I'll see if I can pull some strings to figure out a way to find you!!

Hope you have a very Happy Crimble and a Merry New Year!

Yours always,

JPM

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

New York, late December 1963

Charli sat on the floor of a small dingy room, she took off her jacket. There was a large magpie tattoo that covered most of her upper left arm, its wings spread wide and feathers drifting down her arm, just beneath the tattoo were a series of cuts on her forearm that had been made after she returned home from Christmas with her family.

She tied a rubber tube around her arm and tapped the veins almost angrily.

"Relax, Charli.." Eddie said as he held a spoon over a small flame "It's almost ready"

"Ugh..fuckin' hurry it up," she said, "after the Christmas I had, I'm ready to sleep through the New Year.."

"How are my favourite customers tonight?" an older man with scraggly hair and an unkempt beard asked, staring at Charli a bit longer than necessary.

"Fine..." Charli said tying the tubing tighter.

"Need a needle Charli?" he grinned revealing a yellowed, toothy smile. She knew he "owned" the house, she knew he provided what she needed, but she always felt uneasy when he was around.

"I'm fine, Max. I have my own," she said trying to make him go away. Eventually, he left them alone to go to another room in the house.

"Alright, ready" Eddie said. Charli eagerly unpacked a case she kept her needles in and filled a syringe with the sickly brown liquid as Eddie did the same.

Without much hesitation, she plunged the drug into her veins.

"New Year's Eve, Charli," Eddie said as he prepared himself to do the same, "I say...we stop making this a habit in the New Year"

"Sure..." she said unconvincingly "But tonight, let me enjoy it"

****

1964

Nearly 3 years had passed, Eddie and Charli moved to New York in the late autumn of 1961. There had been a moon landing, which Charli had missed, there were parts she remembered, the rest was a distant memory as she'd been deep in a drug-induced haze. She'd also started seeing the deep-seated racism in American culture and had been glued to the small set in her and Eddie's apartment when a man known as Martin Luther King spoke of having a dream. They'd both been terrified during the Cuban Missile Crisis, the growing tensions in Vietnam and were devastated when the president, John F. Kennedy was assassinated.