The Back Of My Head

Chapter 24 - This Can't Be The End...

SHAUN’S POV

I got a weird text from Bradie saying “come to the old band room asap”.  As soon as I got it I jumped into my car and rushed towards Gorokan. I was in a pretty awesome mood after telling my family about Brooke yesterday. I didn’t think anything could ruin it. Boy, was I wrong…

I switched off my car after pulling into Bradie and Andy’s driveway and headed towards the old band room. It was where everything started about eight years ago. Where all those horrible recordings were made and sung back to us a few short years later in front of crowds up to five thousand. None of us had been in there for about five years after we signed to Sunday Morning Records and could record in a studio. I was curious as to why we were all going back to our beginnings.

I stepped into the room and saw Bradie and Andy sitting on two very old and dusty amps. Their expressions looked none too happy.

“What’s up guys?” I asked leaning against a not so sturdy shelf.

“I went to the doctor today,” Andy replied not being able to look at me.

“No kidding, so?” I questioned needing to know what treatment he was getting.

Andy looked towards Bradie and he put his hand on his shoulder showing support. I have a feeling this isn’t going to be very good news at all.

“My cancer can’t be treated,” Andy began, “it’s the most deadly and the survival rate is zero…”

Andy continued to talk, but I zoned out. What? The survival rate is zero? He’s going to die? No, I can’t lose one of my best friends. This is just a nightmare. It’s not real, it’s not real…

“…the doctor said I’ll go within the next two months.” Andy finished.

What the fuck? How can cancer not be treated? Stupid, dumb, fucked in the head doctors we have around here…

“You can’t…” I started tearing up, “you can’t go.”

I could tell they were tearing up too. Who wouldn’t? I don’t care how stupid this looked. I’m about to lose one of my best friends.

“I love you,” Andy said through his tears.

That set me off. It was like he was saying goodbye forever. I got on my knees in front of the bass amp he was sitting on and embraced him as tight as I could, getting my tears all over his shirt.

“I love you too, Andy,” I cried into our embrace, “so much.”

I looked over at Bradie who had damped cheeks from crying as well. I moved over to him and hugged him too. Andy’s his step-brother, he’d be hurting just as much as him.

“Is that everything I need to know?” I sniffed as I let go of Bradie and sat in front of them.

Bradie and Andy exchanged looks again. Here we go, more bad news.

“There’s the matter of the band…” Bradie replied sadly.

“We can’t…no, we’re not replacing Andy,” I interjected.

“We’re not going to,” Bradie responded avoiding eye contact with me.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

“We’re gonna end it,” Bradie said suddenly.

My heart sank. End it?

“We can’t, why would we do that?!” I questioned.

“I’m not gonna be around Shaun,” Andy answered.

I must’ve sounded delirious.

“I wouldn’t have minded if you and Bradie wanted a replacement,” Andy began, “but, Bradie said that he doesn’t think he can be in a band anymore.”

“What?” I looked at Bradie confused.

“I don’t think being in a band was really me in the first place,” Bradie explained, “you know I like all that behind the scenes music producing stuff.”

“Yeah, but…” I didn’t know what to say, I didn’t want to stop making music.

They looked at me sadly. They knew how much I loved writing songs for our fans.

“I have a kid on the way, how am I meant to support it and Brooke without a job?” I questioned, honestly it was the last thing on my mind.

“You’re talented enough to do this on your own, Shaun,” Andy smiled at me.

“Extremely talented,” Bradie corrected him.

“I love you guys,” I cried and embraced them both.

Is this it? Did we just break up?