Gold That Appears To Be Silver

Chapter I: Black And White

~You can't escape living in your own world if you keep yourself tied to the things that can not be

Accompanied by my favorite novel tucked under my arm, I enter the school building. I always arrive a tad early so I don't have to witness too many ugliness that early in the morning. My thoughts are quickly starting to take over my entire consciousness of everything around me, as if they are a stronger force that will always prevail over my own will.

I can't get Alex out of my head. I have never seen such beauty in a person before, neither male nor female. It makes me wonder if there are more people like her in this world, ones that carry good hearts instead of burdens inside them. Burdens that will reveal themselves sooner or later on the outside, unleashed to destroy.

I had lost all of my trust in humanity, until I laid my eyes on her. I don't know how far her goodness reaches if I judge her by her exterior. She only has a few beauty mistakes that I don't even consider to be flaws. My entire perception of beauty is merely subjective, so maybe Alex could still have a bad heart inside of her according to others.

'Do you always live in your own world?' I hear next to me.

I move my eyes to hers, hesitantly.

'Rather in my world than this one,' I answer while shrugging.

'And why is that?' she asks with her eyebrows raised.

'Humans make this world extremely difficult to appreciate. All of them actually,' I announce with a voice that is filled with bitterness.

Alex smiles, although it differs from the smile that I've already seen. It makes her seem much older than she is.

'Jaydee, humans are not that black and white. There is no absolute good nor absolute evil in humans. We all are in the area between the black and the white. Just like there has to be day and night to attain harmony, humans need the bad and good. You might have met the wrong people who can only show you in particular their dark side.'

I shake my head and focus on my shoes instead.

'Even if that is true, how miniscule is the chance that I will meet someone who will never betray my trust in them?'

Cold fingers are touching my chin. She forces me to look at her, straight into the painful reality of her eyes.

My own reflection is nothing or everything.

'You don't just pick someone because you think they are the least likely to cause you hurt. It's not about the pain or the risk. It's about the person with whom you just mix, either friendly or romantically. Those imperfections make them and you who you are and let your green mix with their red. But it has been enough deep talk for the morning. I'll see you around, Jaydee.'

She offers me a small smile and leaves me to ponder again.

I suppose she is right. I closed myself off when I was nine. That's when I realized I couldn't trust anybody anymore. I knew they were rotten inside, after all. But what if everyone is rotten? Does that mean that it is normal and I should just trust people again?

But what about Alex? She's exceptional. Does that mean that she is the mistake of perfection?

With a muffled sigh, I drag myself and my bag full of books inside the classroom.

I sit myself in the back. The most wanted spot in this class due to the fact that our teacher Mr Thrayne always picks his victims to answer unanswerable questions. He also speaks with spit that even has the ability to fly on the people who are seated on the third row.

And the cherry on top is that he is known for his loud voice and nervous marching around the classroom.

He never reaches the back, thank the spirits, considering that he will be out of breath which is unacceptable during his educative explanations.

The subject he gives is history. Nothing can concur the boringness of that subject, even reading the telephone book will give you less urges to bang your head on the concerning book.

After a few awkward minutes spent on waiting and being watched by the beloved teacher, my fellow classmates are joining the lesson.

Every face contains the same expression. The despair and fear of the prospect of this history lesson is as easily to be read as a book that is meant for toddlers.

I'm surprised when one of the girls sits herself next to me.

She has a massive wart on her chin, doll-like, light brown eyes, a hooked nose and pouty lips. She has shoulder length dark brown, curly hair that makes up for all the other things. Although her ears are strangely shaped, looking like elfish ears.

This girl is perfect for a Fantasy movie. Especially if she could be a witch.

'Hello,' she greets me, her eyes taking me in curiously as if she has never seen me before.

'Hi,' I greet her back, giving her one look and moving my gaze in front of me afterwards.

'You probably don't know my name. I'm Taylor,' she tells me.

I give her a quick glance and nod. 'I'll try to remember.'

'So what is your deal anyway? Why are you acting like everyone has stepped on your toes?"

Her question makes me scrunch up my eyebrows in amazement of her boldness. No one has ever dared to ask such an invading question.

"Why are you even talking to me? I believe I have not expressed any desire to want to interact with you,"

A response such as this one always seems to do its job very well, people always wisely choose to refrain from talking or even looking at me ever again.

A sigh escapes my throat when her annoying voice is echoing through my ears again, she is simply not giving up.

"Would you rather listen to Mr Thrayne's venting about the second World War? I believe he is about to engage into the politics between all the involved parties. He loves to drag it out. Let me drag him out, if you are willing to listen."

A small smile is tugging on my lips. Maybe I should give her a shot, since the alternative is not really any better. 

Now having gained my full interest, I shift my frame towards her and give her one of my habitual nods.

"I'm listening."