Love's Delusion || ✓

Chapter Eight

8

I've spent the last two days in bed, afraid to move. I wasn't sure if I was afraid of Aaron or if I was afraid that I would do something stupid that would set him off.

I did accept his apology but part of me wasn't so sure. I knew he loved me and the only reason that he gets so angry is because he loves me and I do things wrong sometimes but something about him when he had gone off at me the other day, when he raised his hand on me, I wasn't so sure anymore. 

I curled up in my bed, I haven't been up to go to work either-- not that it matters.

Aaron was always right about my art, it wasn't a real job. It wasn't a stable job and Aaron didn't like the fact that I was working since he wanted to be the one that provided for the both of us. 

There were many times where Aaron would yell at me and have a go at me for going to work.

If I was bringing up my art when we were having a conversation, he said that it was infecting how he felt, he would always bring up the fact that he was the man and that seeing me work and earn money made him seem and feel somewhat less manly.

 I would be lying if I said I agreed with him, I like working and I work for myself. Me working makes him no less manly than he is. 

I just know he would love for me to quit this job of mine, and let him handle everything. But so much of my life is him, the house we currently live in-- Aaron bought it, the bed I'm lying in at the moment-- Aaron bought it, hell even the clothes that are on my back Aaron had bought. 

Everything I have and everything I am is Aaron, having a job and earning my own money means that something, no matter how small, was mine. 

A knock on the door ripped me from my thoughts, a voice coming with it; 

"V, you free to go get some lunch?" The door was slowly opened and, lo and behold, Gage was standing in the doorway. 

Gage. 

Aaron had made a huge deal about me hanging out with Gage, it was the reason for the bruises and cuts that were marking my body this very moment. For a moment, I blamed Gage.

Despite the rage that was building inside of me, I couldn't help but look over him. I would be lying if I said he was ugly because he was quite the opposite, he stood leaning on the doorway with his arms crossed as if he had no care in the world. His eyes glistening its hazel glory as a recurring boyish grin made its way on his face. 

He definitely didn't dress to impress with his plain grey tee and deep dark blue jeans that hung just right on his hips, however, he surely impressed me.

I would be stupid to say he wasn't attractive, it was clear to anyone with eyes that he was a sight to see-- but I was spoken for. 

"No thanks." I was monotone with my response, moving to lay on my side. As I moved I could feel pain ripple through my body however I bit my lip to resist the urge to groan at the pain. 

I knew something wasn't right with my body, however, I knew Aaron wouldn't want me to go to the hospital in the state I am in this very moment, it would raise questions that neither Aaron nor I wanted to answer. 

"Why not, I'm sure you're crazy hungry." 

"I'm fine Gage, I'm not hungry actually." And I wasn't. After what happened, eating wasn't the first thing that was on my mind. Hell, I got in this mess because I went to eat with Gage instead of my boyfriend that was waiting for me at home. 

I lost my appetite after what happened in all honestly, I couldn't think of eating when I was afraid of leaving the room. Hell, why was I so afraid when Aaron promised me he would never do anything like that again, why was I so afraid when I was the one that forgave him?