On My Way • Why Don't We | ✓

thirty two

July 22, 2017 ; Portland, Oregon
Daniel

I stand up, gently throwing my sweatshirt over Ev, her legs tucked under her and her torso resting against the window, her head is pressed against the cool surface as she sleeps quietly. Zach sits in the front of the bus, looking out the window.

I immediately notice his dismal face and isolated position on the bus. His eyes search the passing scenery, and internally, I can tell his mind is whirling with thoughts.

"Hey, you good?" I ask while joining Zach.

"Yeah," He shrugs, "Somewhat."

"Want to talk about it?"

He nods, "It's the fans. After they heard about my relationship with Nova, they've been commenting and texting her and just being downright mean. I know she doesn't want to worry me in any way, but I also know the comments are getting to her.

"They don't know the Nova I know, the girl I fell for. Only that she is dating the boy they're a fan of. I just don't know what to do," He runs a worried hand through his hair, "I know that there are super supportive and positive fans out there, but no one should be subject to as much hate as Nova is receiving."

I nod, listening to Zach's words. Even if he's the youngest goofball in our group, his worries are articulated clearly and with strong reasoning. I know it's terrible when some of the best people in the world aren't supportive of what makes you happy. Someone can support what you do—your actions, your success, your choices—without a second thought, but they don't truly know you, or love you for you, if they don't realize what truly makes you happy, what truly puts a smile on your face.

"I don't have a correct answer to the problems. We can truly only hope that at some point others will understand and begin to spread positivity, but the confused and discrepancies between what is the truth and what is not is certainly making the situation more confusing for the fans. They aren't even sure if the photos are real proof that you two are dating, while most assume it some aren't sure," I smile at my bandmate.

"There's going to be rumors and discrepancies and people prying at your personal life, but the mass confusion makes the fans disoriented and skeptical. I think it's best that you decide how to handle the situation with Nova. You two are a team, remember?" I offer my suggestion.

"Yeah," Zach smiles, "Thank you, Daniel."

"No problem," I watch as he turns back to the window, still lost in thought, "Oh, but Zach?"

"Yeah?"

"I've never seen you happier than when you're with her."

. . .

Ev is awake when I finally return to my seat. After my short conversation with Zach, I hung out in the front, watching the passing scenery.

Her eyes flit over a hardcover book. The outside is plainly yellow, and I smile at the familiar sight. Ev despises the paper slip that covers hardcover books, calling them messy and adamant about the fact that they only get crinkled and folded when you put them in your bag. Since she started reading, she's taken them off as soon as she buys a hardcover, leaving them in a wire basket in her room. I once asked why she never threw them away, and she responded simply: Keeping them is like having a library without books.

The sight of an Ev without her eyes glued to her phone screen is refreshing, a distant memory. She doesn't notice my presence as her eyes continue flying down the page. I've missed the old-Ev, with her eyes in a dreamy faraway place.

Knowing not to bother, I take my seat again and work on a few lyrics the boys and I have been working on. We sit in silence, both caught in our own thoughts.

"Hey," Ev's voice rings softly as she closes the book and places it on her lap.

"Hi," I grin.

Between us, a notification lights up her phone, and I glance down at it, only to see the name of the one person I wanted to forget about. My mind races with the memory of Cameron and Megan. Ev glances at her screen, and I expect her to open her phone, but she simply silences her phone and turns it off.

"You can—"

"It's fine," She shakes her head before smiling.

It doesn't take a while for me to notice her tired smiles, the way she curls her lips up to appear happy.

"Look," I take a breath, telling myself it will be okay, "I need to talk to you."

"Yeah?"

"It's, just, well—I," I fumble for my words.

"Daniel, what is it?" She lets out a light laugh.

"I don't want to hurt you."

Her eyebrows knot at this comment, "What?"

"It's nothing. Just, yesterday, at the store, I saw Cameron and Megan. Together," My words begin to tumble out quickly as I ramble, "I know it would crush you because I know you like him, especially after you two have been texting and hanging out, and he seems to be pretty flirty, but that's not the point. I didn't know how else to tell you.

"I always seem to have the bad news for you. Like when I overheard those girls talking about you, saying that they were going to trick you and start a rumor about you or something," She let's out a small chuckle as I continue my rambling, "I honestly can't remember, but I really didn't want to hurt you like—"

"Daniel," Ev interrupts my words.

"Yeah?"

"You've never hurt me in any way."

"But—"

She shakes her head slightly, stopping my words.

"I've had my friends backstab me and guys lead me on. I've had my share of people hurting me, and sure, you told me about some of them, but by telling me, you've never hurt me," She brings her pinky up, "I promise."

I link my pinky with hers, "You sure?"

"Yes, thank you," Ev pulls her pinky away from mine, "Not only for telling me but for being the sweetest and kindest friend."

I grin, pulling her into a hug, "Thank you too," She sniffles into my chest, "You okay?" I ask quietly into her ear.

"Yeah," She nods into my shirt, "I'll be okay."