Sincerely, Jaida

suffocated

a/n: its 1:35 am. y'all so patient. I'd throw a fit if I didn't get a chapter in that long. So, I made it the longest chapter of 2500 words.

also, y'all remember Jordan? he's the police friend.

Jaida

I felt suffocated. The walls were closing in on me and the air supply was quickly thinning in the room. I couldn't get out of the house fast enough.

Inhale. Exhale.

Breathing exercises didn't work once I'd stepped into the fresh air on my porch. I rummaged my hand into my shoulder bag till I hit the smooth circular container.

"Honey, go wait by the car," my gaze shifted to the child holding on to my free hand. She nodded her head and muttered okay.

I watched her retreating back and popped a few tablets to gain control. The sound of the doorknob closing startled me into chucking the pills inside my bag without closing the lid around the orange container.

"You ready?" Xavier's voice was filled with worry and concern as he placed a hand on my shoulder, attempting to draw me to him. I shrugged off his grip on me and quickly shot him a smile. "Yes, I'm fine. We should get going. I let Calista call shotgun," I walked away without waiting for him.

Fuck.

I hadn't asked Calista to sit in front and she didn't request to but right now, I needed the space badly.

"You can sit up front, hon," I said quietly, aware of Xavier just a few steps away from the car. She shrieked a thank you and moseyed her way into the passenger seat.

As hard as I tried to ignore him, our eyes kept meeting in the rearview mirror throughout the whole care ride. An awkward silence filled the car for the whole five minutes it took for us to reach his house.

I knew that look. He wore it way too much then he should around me. It was the one look that guilt trips me for burdening him with my mood swings and bullshit. It was the are you okay? I'm right here, love look.

Once the car came to a full stop in front of his house, Calista was the first to hop out. I needed a breather but as soon as I saw Xavier's body move to turn to me, I exited the car faster than a cheetah escaping the hunters.

"Jaida!" I could hear him calling out but I had already reached the door.

I wish I hadn't.

Leaning against the edge of the door was Pa. Our shocked expressions matched while Cherie smiled gleefully at the pair of us. She ushered Calista inside leaving me to fend for myself with Pa.

"Pops, I-" he cut me off with a stern frown and followed Cherie.

I didn't make a move to go inside till I felt Xavier's hand on my shoulder. "Hey, can we talk about what happened?"

I shot him a smile. "Later, we need to go inside," I said motioning to the others.

His face beamed and he offered me his hand, palm up. "Let's go," his voice was cheery and teasing.

My response was hesitant but I decided better against my own judgement and joined our hands.

It's just hand holding, Jaida.

I followed Xavier around like a lost puppy. His hand tugging me under the arched ceiling of the hallway and through the wooden door enclosing the dining room. It seemed as though Cherie's cars weren't the only thing antique as an old, well-preserved rosewood dining table with matching chairs stood in the middle and pictures in vintage style frames adorned the moss green walls.