savior

twenty one

DAY EIGHTEEN; THIRTEEN DAYS TO GO

On Wednesday morning, Ashton was still sleeping soundly next to me when I woke up. We were both faced the same way, my arm over his chest, like spooning. It was weird, though, because I was a girl, and he was a boy. Normally the position was the other way around. Ashton's fingers were tangled in mine, like he had been playing with them as I slept and they just ended up getting stuck there.

This whole thing was weird, because the two of us had only been friends for a few weeks, but it was almost comfortable at the same time. I didn't know what time it was, or if we were late for school or not, but by the way the town was bustling around, I figured we were.

"Ashton?" I whispered. He didn't turn around to break the position. What I had hardly noticed was that he was shirtless. His coat and shirt were placed right next to him. That was probably a stupid move, considering it was less than fifty degrees outside, but his skin was warm.

I let Ashton sleep for a little longer as I thought about everything that happened last night. It was super dark when we met outside, with this giant blanket sprawled out under us, pillows piled high next to us. We were both quiet for a little while, until he reminded me that something was wrong, and I needed to let it out. He was sweet to me the whole time. He let me explain what I was feeling and didn't bother interrupting me. The world needed more people like him. It was a shame he had wanted to end things in the first place.

The sun continued to drift across the sky, making me wonder what everyone was doing at school. I already knew everything I needed to know this month, with being taken back in time, and all. But Ashton would need to learn the material. I had to wake him up.

I tried to remove my hand from where it was, but it was difficult to take it back when it was being tugged down. Ashton was already awake.

"Armel; can't we just stay here for a little while?" he asked, messing with my fingers, and occasionally lacing them together with his. I felt my face get pink. We weren't a couple, but he was acting like we were, and I wasn't sure how I felt about it.

"Ashton, we have to get to school. We're already late," I said to him, trying to get him up. He turned his body around, so he was facing me. His eyes were red, like he either stayed up too late and was really tired, lit a blunt and got high, or was crying. "Are you okay?" I asked. He still had his hands in mine.

To be honest, I didn't know what to think of that. I knew it was just a kind gesture, and he was still trying to comfort me after all l let out last night, but something inside of me wished it could've been more than that. I told myself in the beginning that dating him wasn't what I was here for, but he was too sweet, caring, and polite for me to not think twice about it. Plus, everything he did was either adorable or really stupid, but made me smile either way.

"I'm alright," he told me, letting go of my hands, and pulling the blanket up to about his neck. He cuddled into it. "I've just been thinking a lot, you know. It doesn't really matter."

I scooted closer to him, and rested my hand on his shoulder under the blanket. It felt so much more than friendly, being here with him like that. He didn't like me as anything more than a friend. I had to respect that.

"If it makes you cry, it's obviously important. Will you tell me?"

I didn't want to be pushy with him about it, but I spent the whole night getting everything off my chest to him and he was shutting me out. It made me feel bad. "I've been—it's just dreams—nightmares, even, but it's okay. Trust me. I'll be fine," he said, as he sat up, propping his body up with his elbow. I could see his chest rise and fall heavily.

"If they become too much, you'll tell me, right?" I asked.

I wanted to be there for him. Not only so we'd be alive by the end of the month, but because I genuinely cared now. Ashton was an amazing person, and he deserved the world. In the beginning, I only wanted to save him because I'd stay alive also, but now that I thought about it, I'd do anything to keep this boy alive; even if it meant dying. That wasn't something I was going to tell Death, because he could make that happen. But I believed it.

Ashton deserved to be happy more than anyone else I knew. More than my parents, or my sister, Michael, or Anna and Calum. I would live the rest of my days as sad as an old widowed woman, as long as Ashton could live with that precious smile plastered on his face.

I didn't even matter at this point.

"Of course I will," he told me. "But only if we can skip school today."

I had never skipped school once in my life. When I was a kid, I was taught that it was one of the worst things you can do as a kid, because you needed your education, and all that. But now that I was older—and I already learned it all anyways—I decided that everything that my parents taught me was bullshit. They never followed their rules anyways.

"Sure. Why not?"