MerAdd Oneshots

Stop texting me weird stuff so late at night

                                                                          2:21 A. M.
Meredith Grey: did you know that female kangaroos have three vaginas?

Me: stop texting me weird stuff so late at night

Meredith Grey was a piece of work.

She'd been given my cell phone number for work emergencies, but the past several nights in a row, she'd been texting me at random; everything and anything you can think of. The weirdest facts, the most obscure stories, the most interesting little informational tidbits. For nearly a week straight, I'd wake up to one in my messages with a time stamps of midnight and later.

"Meredith why do you insist on texting me the weirdest shit after midnight? Is it your witching hour or something?" I ask, irritated. I never knew what I'd get with Meredith and it was somewhat concerning. She was a total wildcard in the game of life, a game I thought previously I'd mastered.

Until my divorce, that is.

She just shrugs nonchalantly "I thought you'd think it's cool. Since you're a gynie and all, three vaginas on a human would be pretty cool" she shrugs it off, like it isn't weird to text your boss shit like this at random.

"It's weird, Grey" I deadpan, unamused and unimpressed with her factual skills.

"Since when does weird mean bad?"

~
12:44 am
Meredith Grey: the loneliest creature on earth is a whale who's been looking for a mate for two decades, but can't find one because other whales can't hear his tone

Me: are you the whale?

Meredith Grey: haha funny. I'm not a whale, thank you very much

Me: I was referencing the lonely part, but alright

Meredith Grey: I'm not lonely either

Me: you're texting me late at night. you're lonely

I hated to admit it, but Meredith's texts were starting to grow on me. As weird and as unexpected as they were, there was something funny about random facts late at night, especially after being up for hours and on the brink of a totally complete exhausted meltdown.

Everything's funny when you're tired.

Nevertheless, I checked my phone every single night before sleeping and every single morning upon waking up and eagerly read the weird fact of the day, compliments of Meredith Grey.

"Maybe I should start sending some weird facts back to you" I counter, as she fills out charts for my patient "you're not the only one who's got fun facts"

She just laughs, slapping the chart shut and pocketing her pen. "Sure, Addie, sure. Keep telling yourself that.

Thus, the fact-war began.

1:32 am
Meredith Grey: I broke my ankle in three places after trying to walk like the models on Americas next top model. I can still pop it in and out of place.

Me: so these fun facts are personal now?

Meredith Grey: there's nothing more fun than a fact about somebody

Me: I went skydiving once when I turned 21, and I had a mild heart attack on the way down. I haven't so much as jumped from the last step in my house since.