not a good idea

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I was already spotting Carissa and all I did was arrive at school. She was waiting, checking her mobile phone, but she didn't answer any single of my messages this past weekend. 

And that's why I wanted to find her as soon as possible. I was nearly running to her.

"Hey, C!" I called out. She looked at me with a big smile on her face. And something was telling me this has nothing to do with me wanting to break up with Jack. I could sense it. "How come you're so happy on a Monday? Hell, I haven't seen you this happy since .... forget it, you've never been this happy. So what went on these days you didn't even want to talk to me?"

"These has been the best days of my life so far Anna, I swear it, apart from our prom, that will be amazing too." She said. "I spent the weekend with Mark and he said he wanted to take things with me seriously and he is considering telling Alex about us." 

My eyes went wide as she spoke and I was mouth gaping when she was done. 

"Holy shit," I said. I didn't know how to react. Was I happy for her? Or was I already suffering for her? I didn't know Mark at all besides the stuff she and Harry have been telling me about him, but I didn't want him to hurt her. Or even worse, what would happen if Carissa gets a crush on another guy when she goes to college? When we go to college? Damn, and what if I was the one who could get a crush on another guy and I was still with Harry? 

I never thought of this. 

Was this something I wanted for a long term?

Doubts assaulted my head, and Carissa didn't seem to notice I wasn't listening to her at all.

+

Should I break up with Jack? 

I wrote that on a piece of paper and gave it to Carissa, who was sitting next to me in this class since Jack didn't make it to school today. I didn't bother in speaking out loud cause my mood really went off through the day. 

She gave me a look when she read it. I arched my eyebrows making her understand I was waiting for her answer. After all, I was a mess full of doubts and insecurities. 

Then I realized she was writing, really focused. She handed me the paper.

I didn't want to be the person who told you this but if Jack hasn't asked you to do sexual stuff yet, then idk why you're still with him tbh. He's either gay or not really interested in you and is doing stuff behind your back. 

I sighed. Maybe this was the truth I needed to face in order to make the right decision. And if not the right one, the closer to it. 

We got out of class together, both quiet. 

"I'm a bad girlfriend," I started. "For doing this to Jack."

Carissa gave me one of her looks that were like 'shut up bitch'.

"No, you're not, it's completely normal to grow feelings for other people." Se continued. "And now let's think about how you'll break up with Jack without ruining him so much. Think, hoe."

I frowned. "What about the class?"

She raised one of her eyebrows. "It's English, I don't know about you but I'm not letting someone, I don't care how hot they are, telling me how to speak my own language."

Sighing. "Then we better get out of here before someone sees us."

Nearly running from there like the devil was chasing us, we got in Carissa's new car.


I'm really sorry this story has become a mess, and I'll leave this one intact when I finish it but I have an alternative storyline for this which I'll post.

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