Affection // irwin

Chapter 13

Ashton doesn’t text me back. Not that day or the next. Or the one after that. I’m too afraid to text him first. What if I interrupt something? What if he ignores it? I hate being the one to take care of things. Doesn’t matter if it’s texting or calling, I don’t want to be the first.

I wonder if he was ignoring me. I saw Michael the other day, him being as friendly as always, and I asked him about Ashton but he didn’t say that anything was wrong. Maybe he just forgot about me… 

At first I didn’t know what to do with the sunglasses so I put them on my desk, but after a day or two, when he still hadn’t texted me, I decided I might as well use them. Hey, free sunglasses! It felt weird the first time I put them on, but they fit perfectly. Even mom complimented me, asked me where I bought them. Not wanting to tell her about Ashton, I told her I bought them at the mall, which is where I am at the moment, trying to find something to wear at the party tonight.

I thought about the party ever since Emma asked me and I decided to go. I will try to avoid Luke as much as I can even though it’s his house so it’s most likely I’ll run into him. But I want to see Ashton. Just his face really. His face always brightens my day, makes me relax. I don’t know if it’s his eyes or his smile, his dimples or his charm. Or just the way he makes me feel. I want him to keep looking at me so I need to find something special to wear. Okay, that sounded wrong. I shake my head. Maybe I could return the sunglasses, even though I’d love to keep them.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with him.”

A squeaky voice says, sounding helpless. I’ll recognize that voice anywhere.

“Like, we barely see each other anymore. He’s so distant.”

I peek out of the dressing room to see two blonde girls outside. One is sitting down, the other one is trying on a pink dress. Amy.

I pull back, praying she didn’t see me.

“Maybe he has someone else?”

“No way. I’m the best he ever had,” Amy says. “Besides, who would want him?”

“Uhm, plenty of girls. You’re lucky to have him.”

“He’s lucky to have me,” Amy corrects the other girl, her voice is getting closer. She must be in the room next to me.

“Amy, you’re phone’s ringing,” the other girl shouts.

“Give it to me. Hello? Nah, Kimmy and I are at the mall. Uhm, shopping? Duh. What else do you do at a mall? You’re such a boy. Yeah, can you?” Amy finishes the call.

“Luke?” The girl named Kimmy asks.

“Yeah. Always wants to know where I am. Such a pain.”

“I think it’s cute.”

“OMG, Kimmy! You totally have a crush on my brother!”

“I do not!” I know Kimmy is blushing even though I can’t see her.

“Yes, you do! Oh my god, why haven’t you told me?” Amy’s voice dies out and I open the door a little to see them heading towards the checkout line, Amy with the pink dress in her hand and Kimmy with a red one.

I can’t be the reason Amy and Ashton don’t hang out much anymore, right? Yet, it makes me feel a little guilty thinking about it. We’ve only seen each other twice. They would still have plenty of time to hang. To kiss and to do other things couples do. Ashton had told me it’s mainly physical so I don’t think it’s much talking they do. And even if they did, they would be on different levels. Ashton’s smarter than Amy. Or at least, that’s how I see it. I can’t imagine Amy being someone you have a serious conversation with. The way she dress and the way she talks, speaks for herself. I shake my head. Here I go again, making assumptions, judging people. I really need to stop doing that.