Affection // irwin

Chapter 41

It’s Saturday and I’m heading to a party again. My third this month and I don’t know if I should be happy about it, that I’m finally getting invited to parties, or not. I would prefer to stay at home, watch a movie, but my parents are bringing some guests over and I rather not stay and talk business with them and tell them what I study and stuff like that. It’s quite annoying and so fucking boring. I need to stop cursing. It’s a really bad habit and I have managed to decrease the amount of times I say the f-word, but I still use it daily.

I had been talking to Ashton through the day, even met up with him for lunch, at Sunday’s, and that’s when he told me about the party. He’s the one who invited me. He still wants me to expand my group of friends, and he told me everyone I know would be at there, which also includes Luke and probably Amy. Amy who I haven’t seen in a while, who I rather much never want to see again but life has never been nice to me so what are the odds we’ll meet up again? Not very high, that’s for sure. 

I told Ashton I would drive there myself, and he thought it was a great idea considering his car was not very trustworthy. But that was not what I was thinking of. I was thinking of the advantages of having your own car and that is that you can drive away whenever you feel like it. Not that I will leave just in the middle of it, but if something happens. Something always happens.

We made a deal that I would text him when I was leaving home but I first realized that as I was pulling up on the street were the party was at. There are cars everywhere and I just can’t help but wonder who even let their kids have parties at their houses. It will be trashed in the morning and the scent of alcohol will probably never leave the walls. The amount of red cups still scares me as I walk inside and is handed two before I can even open my mouth. I put them both down on the nearest table and within three seconds, they are gone. 

I start looking around the place for a familiar face but they all look the same. No Ashton. No Calum or Emma. No Michael…Oh Michael. What he did is unforgivable and I wonder what he has to say for himself. I erased his name off the list of people I wanted to trust. Maybe I really do need to expand my group of friends. Or at least try to relax a little more when I’m around people, and not be tensed up, scared they will break me.

That’s when I spot her, the blue haired girl. 

“Emma!” I call but instead of turning around, she continues up the stairs.

I call her name again as I make my way through the hallway but she doesn’t hear me. Should I follow her? What if she has some guy upstairs? What if I walk in on them having…? Oh my god. I cringe at the thought but decide to see where she’s heading. I hear a door open as I reach the top of the stairs. The closer I get to the end, the louder the voices and as I stop outside the last door, that just happens to be open, I’m pretty sure I hear a voice I recognize.

“No, you listen up, Luke. What the fuck is wrong with you? Why do you keep playing this game? Is it because of Michael and Tania? Because bro, you’ve gotta let it go. They were both wasted and Michael would never do anything like that to you. Plus, you’re blind. You can’t fucking see that Kimmy wants you. She’s got a massive fucking crush on you but you don’t see it." 

Ashton. Yes, that was definitely Ashton’s voice. I peek through the door, hoping no one will see me, and I see Luke sitting on an armchair, his face turned to his left. He looks confused. I try to follow his gaze and first I see Amy looking as bored as usual, heavy make-up and a pink top, and then there’s Kimmy who I now finally get to see. She’s pretty, I can tell even though she’s hiding her face in her hands.

“You’ve got a…crush…on me?” Luke stumbles with the words and Kimmy turns even brighter red under her hands.

“Y-Yes,” she stutters. “Ugh. This is so embarrassing.”