DBH Memefics (And more)

Dinner Time: With Kara and Alice (And Luther and Ralph)

Ya'll ready for some crazy shite with Kara and her family? No me neither.

Another peaceful night in Detroit. Alice came home from school only to see Kara and Luther arguing for the 4th time this week. Luther covered in cakes and stuff while Kara was yelling at him about working overtime or something. Alice went upstairs to do homework not wanting to be a part the mess. It took some time but the commotion calmed down soon enough.

Kara: ALICE! GET YO ASS DOWN HERE GIRL AND HELP ME COOK DINNER!

Alice: But mom, I'm doing homework.

Kara: -Gasp- BUT WHERE DID I GO WRONG WITH YOU!? HOMEWORK IS FOR SISSYS! (You tell em Kara!)

Kara marches upstairs and rips up the homework, making Alice stomp to the kitchen to help.

Kara: Ok, who's ready to cook?! -Smiles insanely-  (This can't end well.)

Alice: -Looks towards Luther and whispers- Help me...

Kara: Ok we're gonna make something...uh...pancake policy...d**ks and sh*t. And we're gonna have Luther here to help us.

Luther: LIKE HELL I AM!

Kara: MUTHA F**KA! DON'T MAKE ME SUCK YO D**K!

Alice: Uh...I should probably not be hearing this...

Kara: -Throws some random stuff in the pan- Now what we need is radish, cucumbers, oranges, sh*t. And then flip it!

When she flips the ingredients, they get stuck on the ceiling. They stare at it for a while.

Alice: Kara, you're a horrible cook.

Kara: And you're adopted. F**k you! -Throws random objects in the air- EXPECTO PATRONUM! (She's a wizard. .-.)

Alice: -Screams as she gets thrown in the air and knocks over Kara- 

Kara: OH FUCK ME IN THE ASSH**L!

Luther: Great, I think you burned it. -Stares at the pan, which is now in flames-

Kara: -Grabs hammer- IF YOU SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT AGAIN, I'M GON MAKE YOU CUM ON THESE T**TIES!

The food falls back down into the pan. Luther manages to grab the hammer and chases Kara around the house.

-1 dysfunctional family moment later-

Kara: Ok, now, we take this and throw all this s**t into the oven. -Literally throws the pan into the oven-

Alice: What about desert?

Kara: Oh yes! I have that planned as well!

She grabs some old pound cake and yesterday's leftovers from the fridge. For some reason, Ralph was in there too with a couple of pigeons and his knife, eating bird seeds.

Luther: -Sniffs the leftovers- What the f**k is that?

Kara: I don't know but it smell like sh*t. -Puts it in a pot-

Alice: Luther, is Kara gonna kill us with her cooking?

Luther: If she doesn't, the food will. OH MY GOD, IS THAT MY STASH?!

Kara: -Is holding up a bag of weed- FUCK YOU! THIS SHIT MAKES ANYTHING TASTE GOOD! Just add a little... -And she just pours the whole bag-

Ralph: -From inside the fridge- Drugs are bad, m'kay. (That's right! Good boi!)

Kara: Now while that's cooking down, we could um...plank!

Luther: Plank where woman!?

Kara: -Is currently planking on top of the fridge- I can plank wherever the hell I wanna plank, it's my mutha f**king kitchen!