Eddsworld: Stuck with their biggest enemy (Torm Fusion)

Tord - Making plans

"Sooooooo... what are we going to do tomorrow?" Edd asked after we had finally helped Matt, cleaned up the whole kitchen by using the vacuum, and eaten something (we just decided to order a pizza for convenience's sake). It was pretty late now and looking out the window showed just how dark it was outside. I could already feel myself starting to get tired which was not helped by Tom being pissed off because he hadn't been able to drink any alcohol today AND was also tired. We were such a mess.

I already knew what Edd was about to ask when I heard the 'Sooooooo'. "You know we will only stay here at... um... home," I answered before glaring at him. When I said home I asked myself what Paul, Patryk and the rest of the army were doing. The army was my home, right...? Without me, their leader, they would probably do things I didn't want to happen, like destroying buildings I want to live in after I had taken over the world. But would that be possible anymore? I was fused with Tom forever and Tom would never agree on taking over the world. He was just too weak and dumb for such a task.

"There is no way we will go outside as a fusion, Edd!" Tom scoffed. "I get called names for having black eyes and now you want me to go out like this?! You're crazy."

"First: you two already went out today, so it won't hurt-"

"We only did that to beat Eduardo up," Tom interrupted him. Edd gave him a death glare. Maybe because he was still not over us beating his rival up. Dear god, get over it. I never knew Edd was also focused on being better than Eduardo. But now I think about it, it explains a lot about all the shit that happened back in primary school...

"Second: it would be just like old times. Years passed since we had the last adventure with Tord!" Edd whined. And that was the reason I had been afraid to come here when I wanted to get my giant robot back. This was the reason why I had tried to get it in secret.

"Yeah, let's have some adventures with Tom and Tord!" Matt jubilated.

"We won't go in public like this!" We yelled back. "Don't you know how strange we look?! Are you really that blind?!"

"Then what do you want to do till you get separated? Stay here until you find a cure? It might take weeks or even months! O-or years even!" No, it would be for all eternity. And that was the thing I hated the most about this situation. It was fine if we were stuck for a few weeks, but I was on a timer. Things wouldn't get better for any of us.

At least he doesn't know we are stuck like this for all eternity... Tom echoed my thoughts.

In one body with Tom for all eternity, that really sucked! Especially because he liked to destroy me by ruining everything I loved. Like deleting my beloved hentai for example!

It will only get worse for us if he finds out about it. He'll force us even harder to get along and stuff. Let's... just not tell him.

But some day he is going to notice what's going on... 

We need to delay that for as long as possible, then he won't notice. Probably.

Stop with your fucking probably, commie!

I can't promise anything...

"Alright Edd, we will come with you," we sighed.

"But if something goes wrong I will leave immediately."

"Yep." Tom nodded in agreement. The image of us saying something and then nodding was actually pretty hilarious if you think about it.

"Yay, a cool fusion adventure!" Edd and Matt cheared, their hands in the air.

"Ugh..." Tom murmured. "And now it's getting more ridiculous..." I felt myself agreeing for once.

"Fusion adventure?" I repeated. "Are you guys serious?! You wouldn't say this if you knew how it's like to be stuck like this!"

"Hey, I have a question," Matt said, completely ignoring what I had just told him. Asshole. "Why are both of you talking together sometimes? Like... you know, one person? That didn't happen before!"

"..." Now that he said it I realized that he was actually right about that. Tom and I HAD started to say things together, like those creepy twins you saw in any horror movie... It kinda scared me. Was that... a bad thing? That we were starting to get used to it? I hoped not. But what if we were somehow becoming... one person, just like Matt said?! But then the fear died away because I realized this wasn't as much of a new development as they thought it was. Back when I used to go on adventures with them, I had felt like saying similar comments to Tom's, but I never enjoyed telling anyone I had the same opinion because that would only make Edd and Matt think we could become friends. And now we were stuck in one body... Maybe they were right at some point and we weren't so different after all. Was I... starting to think he wasn't such a bad person?! No, that was bullshit!

"..." I could sense Tom had about the same embarrassment as me about this mess. It was so strange we hadn't noticed it before.

"...yeah. I actually noticed that as well... You two are finally starting to get along and have the same opinion! That's so great!" Edd smiled. Dear god... "You are becoming friends!" Friends? Tom deleted my entire hentai collection!!! And why did he think it was so great anyway? He should be the one stuck with his enemy for a day, then he would see how 'great' it was! 

Why the actual hell is he so fucking happy about it?!

Oh my-

And now, we're starting this in our thoughts now, too?! Stop it, commie! It's just... strange.

I am just thinking! YOU should stop it, Jehovah's witness! You're head is empty anyway!

Shut up! Just don't let them see any weakness!

"Where do you even want to go with us tomorrow?" 

"Well, TOMorrow I want to go in the new insane zombie pirates from hell movie with you two."

We narrowed our eyes. Did he just...? "Three," we corrected, crossing our arms.

Just stop that, Tord!

It's no use to argue with you about it now. We should talk about this later when we can talk privately.

"That's what I said," Edd insisted with a frown.

"No, it wasn't," Matt replied. At least he had noticed as well. Guess he wasn't as brain dead as I had thought.

"Of course it was!" I knew it wasn't a good idea to tell Edd the opposite. Tom and I both knew better.

"Whatever. I will go in my room to go to sleep."

"That's MY room." Oh for fuck's sake-!

"Then it's both of your room," Edd said.

Tom raised one of our eyebrows. "No, it's not."

"You already share a body, you can also share the same room. What's the issue here?"

I sighed and looked at him. "Do you really think so? Tom's too stubborn for that..."

Before any of them could reply we left the room. We were just too tired for this kind of shit.