One Way Or Another [A TMNT/MLPEG crossover.]

I Hate Cheeseburgers, Or... How Trixie and Leo Broke Up

A/N: The following chapter you're about to read is going to be gross. It was inspired by this hilarious sketch with Leonardo's voice actor, Seth Green that you can watch. This is a flashback chapter.

Leonardo's P. O. V.

I don't like eating cheeseburgers. I don't have anything against burgers in general. At least, I used to. Allow me to explain. When I was a kid, I ate a very bad, moldy, rotten cheeseburger. Like, the meat was bad, and by the time I found out, it was too late. It was so bad, I was puking for days! It was so traumatizing, I can't even eat a cheeseburger without dry-heaving. That's how bad it is. In fact, to this day, I can't even so much as hear the word cheeseburger without hurling. In fact, it's a miracle I'm not even getting nauseous from narrating all this. I failed to mention this little tidbit to "The Great and Powerful Trixie," back when we were in a relationship. It was a few months into our relationship, and I soon found out how toxic it was. Like, we were hanging by a thread. Trixie didn't care about anyone except herself, her expectations were unrealistic, and when we talked, it was The Great and Powerful Trixie that had a conversation with me. Yeah, very one way/one-sided. In fact, whenever she talked in the third person, it was so annoying! The worst part was, she was barely of any help! In fact, she was always getting herself into trouble ON PURPOSE in order for me to rescue her! It was like a damsel in distress combined with a Hero's Syndrome! I didn't want to break up with her because I saw how my brothers' relationships turned out, and they all turned sour. I didn't want to hurt Trixie. But oh, we were one argument or bad day away from a nasty breakup.

Anyway, I was at the lair watching Space Heroes. Raph was sulking in his room since he was still trying to get over Mona's betrayal. Mikey was reading a comic book. And Donnie was in his lab, consuming himself in his work to drown the pain of April dumping him. I was watching a repeat, when suddenly, a familiar voice said, "Hey Babe!" I could recognize that voice. I turned my head, and saw it was Trixie. I gave my best smile to her and said, "Oh hey Trixie. What a surprise!" Trixie smiled and said, "It is indeed a pleasant surprise my Renaissance man! Trixie's got something for you!" I pretended to be curious and asked, "What is it?" Trixie then made a brown bag appear out of nowhere. "The Great and Powerful Trixie bought you lunch!" she said, pulling out a... CHEESEBURGER?!?!?!?! I did my best not to get queasy. Mikey gave that "uh-oh" look, because he saw what happened the last time I ate that infernal sandwich. "Ah Trixie, you shouldn't have!" I said, trying to be nice. I know others like the smell of cheeseburgers, but it's torture for me! And not in a good way! "Well Trixie did boo," she replied, "Trixie is sure you worked up an appetite from all that training!" I took the burger, trying to smile nicely, and looked at it. I managed to swallow whatever vomit tried to rise up in my throat. I then took a big bite of the burger, chewing it, and I forced myself to swallow it. I can fight Tiger Claw with no problems, but it took all my willpower to swallow that one bite to go down my stomach. I did my best smile, lying to Trixie about liking it. I could feel my stomach rising up like a volcano. I instantly regretted what I ate. I then covered my mouth, uttering, "Trixie, stay back!" She'd never seen me puke. She then put her hand on my shoulder, concerned for once, and asked, "Leo...?" 

BLAAAAARRRRRRGH!!!!!!!!!! I hurled out that cheeseburger, and whatever I had for breakfast. But oh, it gets worse. Everything I regurgitated landed on Trixie. It landed on her sorcerer's hat, her cape, her shoes, even a little bit on her hair. Mikey could only watch in dread. Trixie was left speechless. "Sorry..." I said, regaining my breathing. That's when Trixie lost it. "You threw up all over the Great and Powerful Trixie!" she shrieked, getting more hysterical, "YOU THREW UP ALL OVER THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE!!! WHY WOULD YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS TO TRIXIE, AFTER EVERYTHING TRIXIE HAS DONE FOR YOU?!?!?!?!!?!?!" Mikey was about to defend me, but Trixie snapped, "Not a word, Beast Boy!" That's when I got mad and said, "Everything you've done for me?!?!?!?!?!?!?? All you've done is get yourself in trouble just so that I can save you! And now you feed me cheeseb-peosuvzshfqkyhcuvHndxlkhfndvshcgnixdhlkbfdyhlzvubncdozsi!"  That's when I puked again on Trixie again. "Look Trix, when Leo was a kid, he ate a bad cheeseburger," Mikey explained, and I threw up again, "he was puking for days! It was so traumatizing, he can't even hear that word without regurgitating to this day! Sorry by the way, bro..." Trixie glared at me and said, "Why didn't you tell Trixie you hurl every time you heard the word cheeseburgers?!?!?!!?" I threw up again and said, "You never bothered to ask."  

Trixie could only look on in disgust. "You puking, ugly, mutant, freak!" Trixie screeched, "we are so done!" She then got off the couch, and stormed out of the lair, her footprints leaving a trail of my puke. Donnie came out of the lab and asked, "What the heck happened?" We could here Trixie say, "He threw up all over Trixie!" Splinter also came out, saw the mess, saying, "Oh my..." Mikey said, "I think Trixie dumped Leo." Splinter put his hand on my shoulder and said, "You deserved better than her anyway. Why don't you go take a shower, your brothers and I will clean up the mess." I got up from the couch, smiled at my father, and said, "Thanks Dad." I then went to the bathroom, and took a nice hot shower, feeling peace and quiet for the first time since I met Trixie...