Hunting Cheaters | ✓

20 | Say

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"I say your name, just listen. Doesn't it sound different? Never whispered it this way. It's gonna take me a minute, but I could get used to this. The feeling of your fingertips. The feeling of another kiss. It's gonna take me a minute, but I could get used to this"

~ Used to This (Romance)

OLIVIA

I cried for what felt like hours after Hunter left. 

It hurt to breathe.

It hurt to think because my thoughts were filled with him. 

His smile. His laugh. His voice. His kindness. 

His sad eyes as he listened to me tear him down. 

It was all I could see and not even my endless tears could blur the vivid image of how hurt he looked before he left.

When I couldn't cry any more tears, I got up from the bed. I felt heavy with grief. I ruined everything. Everything.

I went downstairs to find the house empty and a mess, especially the backyard. It was night time, though I didn't care enough to check the clock. 

Without thought, I started cleaning. And for a second, I forgot about everything. 

But his words from before came back, flashing into my mind. "If, and it's a big if, I leave, you won't be ruined. You're better than that, Liv. You may be hurt and heartbroken, but you're strong enough to deal with it and eventually move on to something better."

I sniffed, walking over to a sweater on one of the chairs. It belonged to him. I knew it. It smelled so much like him. He was wearing it earlier before he took it off later on in the party.

Tears welled in my swollen eyes and fell. 

I tried to remind myself why I'd done all this, why I'd caused both of us, especially him, so much pain. 

My dad. 

But Hunter wasn't like my dad. 

All the pain I was trying to prevent...I mean, was all of this worth it? Was putting that look in his eyes worth it? 

I hurt him in a way I never wanted to. I broke his heart. I know I did. 

All just so he wouldn't have the power to ever break mine. 

Only I broke my own heart trying to protect it from someone who believed in me. He trusted I'd find a way to be okay, more than okay, without him if he left me. And I was arguing against him, because what, I didn't believe in me being strong enough to handle something like that? Did I think of myself as that weak? 

I almost dropped the cups I was throwing into a trash bag at how far my heart dropped. 

I was such an idiot. 

I was hurting and he was hurting for absolutely no reason. Tonight should've been a happy one, not one we spent separately. 

God, he came looking for me, to tell me about the things he was excited about, to tell me he loved me, to hand me something so precious and priceless, and I ruined everything. 

I let out a shuddered breath and walked into the kitchen to grab a glass of water, catching the time on the stove. It had been over an hour since he'd left.