survive - 생존

Chapter 18 : Love Scenario or Hopeless Love?

I've been on a cloud since yesterday evening. I couldn't forget these sweet words, they're floating in my mind, creating a sweet lullaby that keeps me dreaming since then. We're doing our last rehearsal and I feel like I never sang and danced so well. Maybe it's love. Or I'm maybe just turning crazy. 

But Hanbin is actually watching us with a proud glance, and I can feel how good it is to see your work rewarded. I couldn't get such a look from the director. Thinking of that, I laugh and miss a beat of my part. Despite his pride, Hanbin is still in his leader role and immediately calls my attention.

-Ha Neul, tempo!

I nod with a smile and continue to sing and dance. Mee Na, next to me, is shining as always. A real diamond. When Hanbin's part of the song starts, she raps with a charisma that's dazzling me. I've been working with her for five days, and I'm still not over how amazing she is. 

Right after the rap part, we do our surprise part of the performance, and I'm relieved to see that I'm finally able to do it. It took me a lot of time to break the rythm of Love Scenario to do that part. I'm excited to show it tomorrow since nobody is aware of what we'll do. 

-Let's take a break!

With a sigh of relief, Mee Na and I both fall on the floor and catch our breathe. I'm really proud of that performance, I hope it will work as well as we just did. 

I'm actually lying of the floor with closed eyes when the door opens and a discreet voice apologize immediately before closing the door again. It wasn't loud, and the voice was really husky, but I recognized it. I jump on my feet and run to the door.

-I'll be back in a minute!

In the hallway, Min Hwan is going toward an other door, and I make him turn to me by calling his name. I get a very tiny smile and walk to him. His hair is messy and wet, and when I'm close enough to see his eyes, I notice how empty they look. I put a hand on his shoulder, and he seems to wait for me to say something. Right, I'm the one who called him. 

-Are you okay Min Hwan?

He nods with an even tinier smile and rub his face.

-Yes. Don't worry. 

I take my hand back and stare at him for a few more seconds. What am I doing? Since the beginning of our training together, I always felt that protective instinct toward Min Hwan. I don't know what he's been through, but right now, all I want is hug him. But I won't. I'm about to ask him to talk to me if he wants to, but he interrupts me :

-I'm sorry, I need to go. I have to reach the wasted time. See you noona.

I can't say anything more. He disappears in a practice room and I end up alone in the hallway. Just five seconds later, Jimin arrives and looks at me with a helpless and lost expression. 

-Where is he?

I point at the door where he went, and she left me too without any word more. Looks like all I have to do is going back to word. So I come back to my own practice room with a depressed face. Mee Na and Hanbin, who where talking, stop their conversation and both look at me with curious expressions.

-Are you okay Ha Neul?

I nod and sit next to Mee Na. 

-I'm just wondering about what's going on with Min Hwan... I hope I could help him but... I don't know. 

Hanbin sighs and leans backwards on his chair.

-Life can be so complicated sometimes. 

I can't help but laugh at the fake despair in his voice. Mee Na gets up and stretches her body while pouting.