Joe and Dianne: My Suicide Saviour - Part 2

What to do

Dianne's POV:

It had been two weeks since the freak out Joe and I had. We were still waiting on a call from the police after my attack and I had moved all my focus away from the attack, and onto getting Joe and I back on track.

Joe was getting better but slowly. Almost every night he woke up shaking or sweating after the nightmares that he's been having. I'm slowly running out of ideas as to how to get him back to his old self.

I haven't seen Joe laugh properly in over a month now, and his eyes which were once their characteristic crystal blue, have stayed a murky shade of grey for several months now.

Since the freak out he had a few weeks ago, I had caught Joe trying to cut himself two more times - thankfully I've been there to stop him. I've made a habit out of checking Joe's arms every night before I curl up into his arms in bed, just to be sure.

Joe was in his office filming a video explaining why he's been away from his channel for the past 6 months or so. He decided last night that maybe the only way for him to move on would be to go back to the way things where before he met me and all this shit kicked off. I still can't help but feel more than guilty about what Joe has been put through. When I first saw Joe in that make up room, he had the biggest smile on his face. He seemed content with life. He seemed so innocent and so happy.

I think I have a habit of making men go insane. And not in the good way.

When I first met Anthony, he was so sweet and kind. He made me laugh and made me feel safe. But near the end of our relationship, well... We know how that ended. The last boyfriend I had back in Australia was one of Andrew's old friends from school. He was the nicest person I knew and for sooooo much of my childhood I had a crush on him. After us going out for almost 2 years, he asked me to marry him. I said no because I didn't want to be tied down in Australia at the age of 24. This guy then blamed Andrew for the fact that I said no, punching my big brother in the face and threatening my parents.

I don't know what it is about me, but I have a feeling that I'm the reason that boy's lives get wrecked and the reason that they become jerks. All I can do is hope and prey that Joe never gets that way...

That the sweet and innocent boy I met in that makeup room doesn't hurt me like those before him.

Those before the one

Joe's POV:

I sat in my office, looking at the dusty filming equipment and neglected remains of my channel. With everything that's going on, I couldn't just sit by anymore waiting for the phone to ring with news on that bastard Anthony Quinlan.

I knew that Dianne was trying not to think about what had happened to her for my benefit. I also knew that she's getting fed up with how pathetic I've been acting recently. It was about time that I got my life back on track.

I turned on the recently charged up camera and spoke towards the mic.

"Right so I know that it's been a very very very long time since I've uploaded, and I do apologise for that. Now as a lot of you probably know, because the press have covered it all sooooo much, Myself and my strictly partner, turned girlfriend, Dianne Buswell have had some..... Let's call them upsets."

I swallowed hard, clearing the lump in my throat. My usual energy could be seen on face value, but deep down it was all fake. I hadn't had to smile this much in a long time. It felt good, but at the same time so, so wrong.

"Because of these, I haven't had the time, energy or ability to film anything for you guys."

I knew I had to wrap up this video soon as I felt a single tear role down my cheeks. I quickly wiped it away, hoping I could edit that bit out without it being too obvious.

"I'm sorry once again, thank you all so much for your patience and your support. Sorry this was a quick video, but I will eventually get back to my regular scheduling. I'll see ya soon."

I shut off the camera, and lent back in my desk chair. I released a large breath and stopped thinking about what had been said and what had been done.

As I lent back, I saw a Polaroid picture of myself and Dianne from my party almost one year ago. I couldn't help but remember that night. Her and I dancing and getting way to drunk. That night was when I first thought about her as someone I could be with. Someone that I could learn to love. It was about time I repaid Dianne for all that she had done for me.

I googled some flight times and booked the tickets for her and I to go away for a few days before she had to be back for her new season of strictly.

I didn't book flights to Australia, I booked us somewhere away from prying eyes.

Somewhere famous.

Somewhere.... Romantic.