Brooklyn Nine-Nine

01 | Five Idiots & Sarge

"Sergeant Jung," the new Captain, Kim Namjoon, called out as he opened the door to his office. "Report to my office immediately," he said and closed the door.

Hoseok paled. He didn't even leave the door ajar for him to go inside.

Everyone turned to Hoseok who looked like a deer caught in headlights. "W-what? I'm sure it's nothing!" he exclaimed.

"Are you still gonna say that when you walk out without your badge and gun?" Jungkook teased as he headed to the fridge in the break room.

"It's been a day and I've been an angel compared to you guys!" Hoseok complained, burying his face in his hands.

"Come on, Sarge, cheer up!" Jimin said cheerfully, squeezing his shoulder in a reassuring manner.

Hoseok looked up at him with a smile. "Thanks Ji—"

Jimin leaned in till his lips were at Hoseok's ear. "If you get fired, I'm coming for your position, so watch your back," he whispered and walked off with a friendly smile on his face.

Hoseok looked mortified. "Demons. You're all demons," he spat.

"Tick tock, tick tock," Jungkook teased, walking back to his desk with a baby bottle full of coffee. He squeezed out a drop onto his forearm and licked it. "Yikes, I forgot the sugar," he said, turning on his heel and walking back to the break room.

Hoseok shuddered and stood up, adjusting his sleeves. He walked into Namjoon's office after knocking and got down on his knees as soon as he closed the door.

Namjoon raised a brow. "What are you—"

"I don't know what I did, but I'm so sorry," Hoseok apologized. "Whatever it was, I'm sure it was Jungkook's fault anyways!"

"Er, that's not what I called you in about," Namjoon said, scratching his cheek. "Stand up, please. This is making me uncomfortable."

A sigh of relief escaped Hoseok's lips and he stood up, muttering a quick prayer to himself as he did. "Sorry Captain, you really spooked me," he said. "What did you need?"

"I want you to tell me about the Nine-Nine," Namjoon said, standing up to look at them from the window of his office.

"Oh boy," Hoseok muttered under his breath. "Anyone in particular?"

"Tell me about Officer Min," he said.

Hoseok suppressed the bitterness he held toward the guy so he could voice an unbiased opinion. "Yoongi's outstanding. He's smart and he's your guy if you need a confession out of someone. He just has a few problems..." he trailed off and they watched as Yoongi snoozed on his desk. "He's lazy and rude."

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"Now you've fucking done it, Jungkook!" Jin yelled in a panic.

"I didn't know tazing the microwave would start a fire!" Jungkook argued.

"Well did you think it was going to fucking surrender and let you handcuff it?" Jin retorted, throwing the fire extinguisher into the flames.

"That's not how you use a fire extinguisher, Jin!" Jimin screamed. "Oh fuck it, just evacuate already! Yoongi, wake up for the love of God!"

Yoongi was out like a light, snoozing softly in his arms while the desk next to him was engulfed in flames.

"How the fuck is he still sleeping?!" Hoseok exclaimed.

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