For Forever: Dear Evan Hansen One Shots

Another masterful attempt ends in disaster

A/n: Warning! Attempted suicide and a bit of a cliff hanger at the end.

(Cynthia PoV)

Cynthia was humming to herself as she was pouring another cup of coffee for Larry.

'Connor finished the milk!' Zoe mutters from across the table, obviously annoyed. The Murphy family, minus Connor who had gone to his room, ate in silence. It was awkward and uncomfortable.

'So, Larry, how is work?' Cynthia asks to break the silence.

'Busy.' He replies shortly. Larry looks at his watch and jumps up suddenly. 'I'm heading out.'

Zoe stands as well. 'If Connor's not ready I'm leaving without him.' She puts on her backpack and walks towards the door.

Cynthia leans against the wall and sighs. She tries so hard. TV makes families look so easy. But this? How had she got it so wrong?

Cynthia hears Zoe's car roll out of the driveway as Connor mopes downstairs. 'Has Zoe left?' Cynthia nods. 'Shit.' He grabs his bag and rushes out the door.

Cynthia slowly starts to do the breakfast dishes.

'Alexa, play Sing to me Instead'

'Ok' comes the reply from Alexa.

Sing to me Instead was a new album from one of Connor's schoolmates, Evan Hansen, and Cynthia loved it so much. If only Connor could have nice friends, like that Evan Hansen kid. As a matter of fact, Cynthia didn't think she had ever met any of Connor's friends. Did he have any?

Finishing up with the dishes, Cynthia moves over to the living room. Today, she decided, was going to be a mental health day. She was just going to sit, watch movies, listen to music and eat food. She needed a break from the stress of keeping the family together after all.

...

(Connor PoV)

It was a terrible day. There was no doubt about that. But then again, when was it not a terrible day?

'Hey Connor, loving the new hair-cut, very... school shooter chic.' He hears the sarcastic laugh of Jared Kleinman.

He turns around slowly and stares at Jared, showing no emotion.

'It was a joke. I was joking.' Jared explains, as if talking to a two year old.

'Yeah, no, it was funny, I'm laughing can't you tell? Am I not laughing hard enough for you?' Connor deadpans.

Jared backs up with his hands in the air.

'You're such a freak!' He laughs squeakily and then runs off. What a coward.

Connor hears a nervous laugh from behind him. He turns and stares at the kid. He looks petrified, terrified.

'What the fuck are you laughing at?' The kid looks close to fainting.

Connor goes blank with anger. He can't remember what happens after he says that, but he now knows that he is sitting in a bathroom, with the image of the scared look of the kid imprinted in his brain.

'What the fuck have you done Connor?' He whispers to himself. The kid had done nothing to him and he had freaked out.

He locks himself into a stall and sits down. He puts his head in his hands. He just wished that everything would stop. Could stop.

He was so sick of life. It would just be so much easier to just... disappear.

Really, would anyone even notice if he did just disappear tomorrow. His family would be happier, random kids wouldn't get pushed over for no reason. Everyone would be better off.